“Life can change quickly” was the saying that was brought to the forefront this week.   Due to a slight miscommunication we were asked to take the referral of an older little boy this week.  Oh how my heart wants to help all the little ones out there.  His age was a couple years beyond what our request was.  We know Horizon House (our orphanage) has very few children that remain in the orphanage, so we do know that this little boy will have a home.  It’s hard though, saying no.  Are we awful?  We just know that our child is a little one.  We just always have.  We have four beautiful children and we just know.  Wow, it’s hard though.  I feel a little ill. 

 

I know my capabilities (to some extent at least)…my patience level, my gifts, my limitations (and boy do I have a lot of those!).  I always question myself though…are we doing the right thing?  I knew we were and then when I started feeling sicker (I have a sinus infection) I started questioning.

 

If nothing else I know that two blessings came out of this.  Number one (blessing wise) was that we are helping the agency iron out the “kinks” and “glitches” that any newly established interagency program have.  The Second is that we have had a wakeup call.  Waiting to do what we need to do before the baby arrives is not an option.  Life can change quickly in an adoption.  We can’t keep on waiting to do the things we need to do or establish the routines we need to establish.

 

 I keep on saying that God has his own timeline, but know what?  HE ACTUALLY DOES! LOL.. I better start crackin’!

Sorry it’s taken so long to get blogging again, we seem to have been going through a “sick season” and even now it’s my turn.  I guess that’s why I have time to set down…lol.  

 

We’ve been on the waiting list with Wide Horizons for about three months now.  I know in the normal series of events we will probably be referred our little one sometime around the end of November.  It seems so far away.  I hate telling people that though, because God works on a different timeline and I don’t want to show in any way a lack of faith.  God works.  He’s worked wonders in this adoption and He has his hand on it even now.

 

I went to the book fair at the kid’s school today.  I came out spending WAY too much money.  It’s amazing how much it costs to buy five books for my kids and three books for the teachers.  Yes, I bought one for each child including our new little one.  I feel like I should be getting ready, but I have a hard time not knowing if it’s a girl or boy OR even knowing what age our little one will be.  I can’t buy much, so I buy little unisex things when I see them.  When we finally do know the sex I pity our budget (this probably being our last child).  It will be all tough boy stuff or all little fru fru girly stuff (poor Thomas).  It all seems so far away though that I don’t feel the “drive” to get things done the way I probably should. 

 

I watched “Facing the Giants” the other day with my family (LOVE IT!) and they told a little story about two farmers going through a drought.  They both prayed fervently for rain, but only one farmer prepared his field.  Which one showed more faith?  I feel like I’m not preparing “my field” like I should (except for reading).  Granted, we have started home schooling TC (12) on Tuesdays and Thursdays AND have been sick, BUT…I feel like I’m full of excuses

 

There really is so much I need to do.  A lot of it doesn’t take a ton of money (painting, etc.).  The baby is going to be in Thomas and I’s room for at least the first year.  We want to encourage bonding and I’m really praying I can adoptive nurse.  I say that because I’m trying to say we REALLY need to paint our room.  We are going to do two connecting walls dark blue and two light tan.  The baby’s wall is going to have a ribbon across it that says “Surrounded by love” and we are going to seal family pictures (measured in squares) to the wall on the ribbon.  We may paint an angel there as well.  See?  I told you I needed to get things done..lol…I guess with a family of six (soon to be seven) that’s a given.

 

Anyway…I set here with a plastic Target bag with a “snot sucker”, baby fingernail clipper set, and a book.  That’s all I have.  I only need to get a highchair, playpen, swing, car seat, clothes, diapers….the list goes on…lol.  Anyone want to throw me a baby shower? LOL…Just Kidding. 

 

Well…I hear the wonderful “Mommy!” page and am going to go help Anna with her make up homework from her week long illness (last week).  I promise I will TRY to get better at blogging, but often we go a long time with not much news, sooo….have an awesome night and stay sane (NO FUN!).