TEXT: II Timothy 3:10-11 = But thou hast fully
known my doctrine, manner of life, purpose, faith, longsuffering, charity, patience, Persecutions, afflictions, which came
unto me at Antioch, at Iconium, at Lystra; what persecutions I endured: but out of them all the Lord delivered me.
INTRODUCTION:
·
If we were to ask you the mission of your marriage or family could you or your spouse or your children
clearly articulate it?
o Would the members of your family say even remotely close to the
same thing?
o Would we be able to say anything at all?
o Have we ever given much thought about the “mission” of our family?
The 3rd thing mentioned in the list in our text
is “purpose”. Paul reminded Timothy that he had “fully known” Paul’s purpose in life and ministry.
·
What is your purpose in life? How would you complete this thought: “I
was created to be _______ and do ________?”
o Do you know?
o Have you ever stopped to think about it?
o Have you ever taken time to write it down?
·
Furthermore…
what is the purpose or mission of your family?
OPENING CHALLENGE:
·
In this message,
I primarily want to challenge you to determine your own purpose in life. Secondly, I want to encourage you, not only to think
about your purpose, but I want to show you how to write out “Purpose Statements”
both yourself and another for your family.
·
Many people are drifting through
life without much purpose!!
·
"More men fail through lack of purpose than lack of talent." - Billy Sunday.
·
We NEED to know our purpose in
life!
·
We NEED to know the purpose or
mission of our family!!
Ephesians 5:17 = Wherefore
be ye not unwise, but understanding what the will of the Lord is.
THE THREE BIG QUESTIONS: (What? Why? and How?)
1.) What is a “Purpose Statement” or “Family Mission
Statement”?
2.) Why should I (and
my family) have a Purpose / Mission Statement?
3.) How do I go about
developing a Personal or Family Purpose / Mission Statement?
1.) What is a “Purpose Statement” or “Family Mission
Statement”?
A. A Personal or Family Mission Statement is a written declaration of your
(or your family’s) purpose in life. It is a clear, simple, and succinct sentence or paragraph, which even a child
can understand.
B. A Personal or Family Purpose Statement is simply a paragraph that summarizes what you hope to accomplish
in the next several years while everyone is under a single roof. It acts as a daily reminder of the important goals
that you want to reach in your life.
C. A mission statement
is simply a statement of what guides you, what inspires you, or what you want to accomplish in your life. (April Mims)
D. A Personal or
Family Mission Statement answers the “big” questions: (Matt Perman)
i. What will be the center of my life?
ii. What will be the character of my life?
iii. What will be the contribution of my life?
E. A Personal or Family Mission Statement is the “master
plan” or “master vision” for your life or for your family.
EXAMPLE: A “Family Mission Statement” is like a road map.
It is a tool to show you where you want to go and how to get there. It is also a tool to help you communicate to others
where you are headed with your family.
F.
“Personal Mission Statement” samples:
i. “I want
to love God with all my heart, soul, mind and strength; and I want to exhibit His love to everyone around me by witnessing
and doing good deeds for others.”
ii. “My mission is to make a
positive Christian impact on the lives of others by so living my faith that it cannot be described by mere human terms.” David F. Smith
iii. My purpose is to bring glory to my Lord and
Saviour Jesus Christ through consistent worship of him with my praise and my life; to cultivate an inner-life growth that
reflects the grace of God, and to equip men and women for ministry. (Salvation Army)
iv. God designed
me to use my organization and relational abilities to lead, manage and encourage others. I feel God’s pleasure when God uses me to bring wisdom to a problem, accomplish a goal, develop a
practical tool or conceptualize a clear process or system. God has designed me
to communicate His truth to others with an emphasis on practical application. (Servants By Design)
v. "To live the rest of my earthly life for the
will of God." (Patrick Morley)
vi. It is my purpose to live all aspects of my life in proper balance, guided by the teachings of scripture,
the leading of the Holy Spirit, and the wisdom of my family and Christian friends. It is my desire to be more like Christ
each and every day, with my life reflecting the essential qualities of the Christian walk.
vii. I want to live life with a song in my heart
serving God with every breath that I take. I will love, cherish, comfort and teach each person within the reach of my ministry.
I will place God above all things striving to be more like Christ. I am committed to teaching from Bible based curriculum
using methods which are educationally sound. I will live a life of learning, continuing to invest my time in reading and studying
to better understand myself, the church, people and ministry. (Martha K. Hall – Christian School Teacher)
viii. My personal mission is to encourage people to choose God’s best in life and to live a life of faith,
integrity, morality, and intellectual preparedness. I will do this by encouragement,
mentoring, and living as a model of these characteristics. (David Neidert)
ix. “For to me to live is Christ; to die is gain.” (The Apostle Paul - Philippians 1:21)
G. “Family Mission Statement” samples:
i. "Our purpose as a family is to provide a safe
environment for children and grownups alike to learn more about loving and serving Jesus through the act of learning how to
love and serve each other."
ii. “Our purpose
as a family is to bring glory to God through the love and choices we make as individuals and corporately as a family.”
iii. “This family's purpose is to love God
and to love people. We try to show our love for God by obedience. We express our love for people in many ways, but we especially
love them by sharing Jesus with them.”
iv. “The mission of our family is...to create
a place of order, truth, love, happiness, and relaxation; and... to provide opportunities for each person to become responsibly
independent and effectively interdependent,... in order to achieve worthwhile purposes.”
v. Our Family Mission
To encourage others to become like Christ through loving relationships, healthy lifestyles,
and stimulating experiences.
vi. Our Family Mission
To love each other...
To help each other...
To believe in each other...
To wisely use our time, talents, and resources to bless others...
To worship together...
Forever.
vii. An acrostic: (using an example from the Smith family)
Serve God in all things we do
Meet challenges and adversity with love
Invite others into our lives so we can share God’s love with them
Teach our children the Truth of the Gospel
Help others
2.) Why should I (and
my family) have a Purpose / Mission Statement?
A. It will give direction and unity to yourself and/or to your family!
Having a Family Mission Statement
allows each member of the family to realize their family is an entity in itself, with clearly defined goals. They are not
just a group of individuals going their own separate ways, but they are actually a group with an identity and purpose all
its own. (Deborah Taylor-Hough)
B. It will give purpose to your family!
i. "More men fail through lack
of purpose than lack of talent." - Billy
Sunday.
ii. "Anything less than a conscious commitment to
the important is an unconscious commitment to the unimportant." —Stephen Covey Source: "Bottom Line: Personal," January
1999, p. 7.
EXAMPLE: One day the department store manager left all
the windows open and a great windstorm blew all the price makers around the store causing them to land in total disarray.
The next day, the shoppers delighted to see socks for $149.95, suits for $1.19, shoes for 5 cents, and a scarf for $1,299.99!
This
is how worldly Christians live every day. The put low value on spiritual things and high value on things with none. Stop living
your life as though the price tags got mixed up!
C. It will give strength to your family!!
i. Most children of Christian parents lack a clear and compelling family vision that is multi-generational in scope. They
are largely unsure of who they are and why they were created. They are missing an anchor, a sense of divine purpose in their
lives. Greg Gunn
ii.
A clear mission statement answers three questions:
1. Who or what
is your ministry focus?
2. What needs
are you seeking to meet?
3. How will you
accomplish your mission?
D. It will add joy to your life!!
i. Instead of merely existing; you’ll
know you are actually fulfilling your life’s calling.
ii. Your “job” or “role” can be turned into your “cause”.
E. It will create
a challenge to motivate you.
F.
In summary…your Purpose / Mission Statement:
i. Proclaims your (or your family's)
ultimate goal, reason for being, and vision for the future.
ii. Is the big picture of what is most
important to you (or your family).
iii. Will reflect your values, what you
want to be, and what you want to do.
iv. Will determine the use of your time,
energy, and money.
v. Is used to initiate, evaluate, and
refine all of your life's activities.
vi. Is a declaration of what you or
each member of your family will live by.
vii. Should include your spiritual values,
the fundamental truths and foundational principles upon which you will build your live(s).
viii. Will define your (or your family's)
common purpose, specify your direction, and provide a compass to guide and measure your progress.
ix. Will help you or your family to
appreciate your unique identity.
x. Will enable each member of your
family to see himself as part of a team cooperating to achieve a God-given task.
G. Ways in Which Families Can Use a Family Mission Statement:
i. Use
a Family Mission Statement to create unity
in your family.
ii. Use a Family Mission Statement to
create meaningful family goals.
iii. Use a Family Mission Statement to
help make big decisions.
Because
family mission statements are expressions of our priorities and values, they can help keep us focused when it comes time to
making some big decisions.
For
example, is taking the big promotion clear across the country in line with what we said we wanted in our mission statement?
Is
career progression one of mom or dad’s goals, dreams, or aspirations? If so, will the move and promotion fit with
what we said was our purpose in life?
These
are the kinds of questions you should ask whether you are facing a career change, move, or any significant lifestyle change.
iv. Use a Family Mission Statement to
monitor and order our daily priorities in
areas such as…
1. the way money will be saved and/or spent
2. the importance of education
3. the amount of family time you will spend together
4. the importance of activities outside the home and school
5. the responsibilities each member of the family will
have toward maintaining the household
6. the daily schedule we keep
7. the daily habits we learn
EXAMPLE: Planned Neglect
In her book A Practical Guide to Prayer,
Dorothy Haskins tells about a noted concert violinist who was asked the secret of her mastery of the instrument. The woman
answered the question with two words: 'Planned neglect."
Then she explained. 'There were many things
that used to demand my time. When I went to my room after breakfast, I made my bed, straightened the room, dusted, and did
whatever seemed necessary. When I finished my work, I turned to my violin practice.
That system prevented me from accomplishing
what I should on the violin. So I reversed things. I deliberately planned to neglect everything else until my practice period
was complete. And that program of planned neglect is the secret of my success."
Our Daily Bread, April 22
v. Use a Family Mission Statement to
help regain focus
EXAMPLE OF LOSING FOCUS: The Taj Mahal is one of the most beautiful and costly tombs ever built, but there is something fascinating about
its beginnings.
In 1629, when the favorite wife of Indian
ruler Shah Jahan died, he ordered that a magnificent tomb be built as a memorial to her. The shah placed his wife's casket
in the middle of a parcel of land, and construction of the temple literally began around it. But several years into the venture,
the Shah's grief for his wife gave way to a passion for the project.
One day while he was surveying the sight,
he reportedly stumbled over a wooden box, and he had some workers throw it out. It was months before he realized that his
wife's casket had been destroyed. The original purpose for the memorial became lost in the details of construction. Dr. James Dobson, Coming Home, Timeless Wisdom for Families, (Tyndale House Publishers, Wheaton; 1998),
p. 122
§
Sometimes we are moving so fast in our lives that we often forget why we made the choices we did to get us to
our current place.
§
It is often easy to get caught up in the hectic pace of life and suddenly say to ourselves, why are we doing this? What
was our original motivation? Why did I take this job? Why did I volunteer to do this?
§
This is where a family mission statement can be extremely powerful. By looking back at the priorities and
fundamentals your family identified in the family mission statement, you can better see and ask yourselves whether or not
the choices you have been making are consistent with what you said was important.
§
If your choices haven’t been consistent with the family mission statement, ask yourselves these two questions:
“Why haven’t our choices been consistent?” and “What do we need to change to stop making the choices that get us off track?”
vi. Use a Family Mission Statement to
renew your motivation(s)
Because
family mission statements are an expression of every family member’s dreams, goals, and aspirations, they are a great
place to go to when we need some motivation or are feeling burnt out.
vii. Creating a family mission statement is an excellent way to give
the people you love a chance to be part of something bigger than themselves. (Family Matters parenting Magazine)
3.) How
do I go about developing a Personal or Family Purpose / Mission Statement?
A.
Pray for God’s direction, wisdom, and insight.
B.
Just get started! Just because a mission statement is so important and awesome-sounding, doesn't mean that it
needs to be an overwhelming task. You CAN do it!
C.
Use Scripture.
D.
Get alone with God or call a family meeting. Write down ideas of what is important to you. You might start off by pointing out something like the following:
i. "God could have selected any combination of
people to place within this family. And yet he handpicked each one of us. Why do you think he put us together the way he did?”
ii. “Let's brainstorm ten goals he might have
for us to accomplish as a family."
iii. OR… “let’s each of us take
a few days to write down our top 10 core values.”
NOTE: Although you DO want to include the ideas of all family members, be sure to explain
to your children that your family is NOT a democracy. God gave parents as guides for the family.
E.
Use questions. Have everyone jot
down brief answers to the following questions and share them among the family. (Give examples for children so they can understand
what the question is asking.) (Feel free to change questions to fit you and/or your family.)
i. What did God have in mind when He
placed us together?
ii. What are the most important qualities and values we have as a family?
iii. How can our family inspire one another to love the Lord?
iv. What does God want our family to be known for; or how do we want others to describe
our family?
v. What does God want our family to do?
vi. How does God want our family to be?
vii. What are our greatest strengths – and weaknesses?
viii. What convictions and passions really
motivate us?
ix. What are your spiritual gifts?
x. How can our family fulfill the Great Commission of spreading the Gospel?
xi. How will our family reflect Godly values?
xii. Years from today, what accomplishments do you think would give you the greatest
satisfaction?
xiii. What memories do you want to have of family life after the children are grown
OR when you grow up?
xiv. How should the world be different because of our family?
xv. What goals has God laid upon your heart for your children to reach while they
are at home?
xvi. What is it that makes you feel happy or fulfilled?
xvii. What do we want for our family?
F. Take these answers and lists of
core values and narrow it down to the top 3 or 4 main themes agreed upon by the
entire family.
G. Work out differences patiently.
i. Don’t assume
that you will all have the same vision and goals.
EXAMPLE: One couple started to do this
project and one of his top goals had to do with outreach to the community while that didn’t show up on his wife’s
list at all. Some reevaluation and negotiation had to be done.
ii. Some things may
have to be kept as individual goals – which did not make it into your “Family
Mission Statement”.
NOTE: This would be a good project to
do during courtship so that these differences can come to light beforehand.
H. Don’t be afraid to take risks or
“aim high”. At the same time, be realistic.
EXAMPLES:
·
Two men look out through the same bars: One
sees the mud, and one the stars. (Frederick Langbridge)
·
Do not let what you cannot do interfere with what you can do. (John Wooden)
·
Unless you try to do something beyond what you have already mastered, you will never grow. (Ralph Waldo Emerson)
·
A vision without a task is but a dream; a task without a vision is only drudgery; but a
vision and a task are the hope of the world! (Anonymous)
·
Think
of it this way: calling is what you do, purpose
is why you do it, and vision is what will happen as a result. (Patrick Morley)
I. Use your top 3 or 4 main ideas to create your own “Personal OR Family Mission Statement”:
i. Start with “Our
purpose as a family is....”
ii. Make your Mission Statement
as precise and simple as possible.
iii. Make sure your statement reflects the core values of your
family.
iv. Be sure your statement includes at least one objective.
1. State in a phrase or sentence an objective in fulfilling your purpose statement.
2. Begin your objective(s) with “to...”
or “in order to…” and complete your statement in such a way that you would see your purpose statement
fulfilled.
v. Try using a 3-pronged approach:
1.
To…. (Do something)
2.
In such a way that….. (Quality of action)
3.
So that…. (We gain these results or benefits)
vi. Take any negative objectives (Such as: "…in order to fight less…") and make them positive ("…in order
to live in harmony…"). If possible, include a practical example of how that goal might be met ("…in order to live in harmony by considering each other's needs as
more important than our own.")
J.
Give it time to develop. Take time to think it through and make revisions over a period of weeks. Review it at
least annually with the intention of updating or changing it as the Lord leads.
K.
Keep goals separate from the Mission Statement.
i. Try to keep your Mission Statement
short, simple and powerful.
THE DIFFERENCE
BETWEEN A MISSION AND A GOAL:
Family goals are
specific things the family wants to do or achieve. Family goals are measurable and are time constrained or phased.
Family goals are one of the means by which families live and express their family mission statement.
Family mission statements are
expressions of the overall intention, purpose, and priorities of the family. They help families keep focus not only
on the things they want to achieve (i.e. family goals), but the manner in which they want to achieve them, and the benefits
or results the family wants to gain. (Families with Purpose)
ii. By all means use your Mission Statement
to create goals for yourself and each individual in your family.
1.
Specific goals form the detailed
plan that enables each member of the family to contribute to the purpose statement.
2.
Carefully consider each goal and
make sure they meet the following criteria:
a.
Is it Biblical? Do I have a verse
or moral reason to support this goal?
b.
Does it fit our stated purpose
as a family?
c.
Does it bring glory to God or glory
to us?
d.
Is
it specific? (Does it describe in detail what
you want to accomplish? Does it use terms that can be easily evaluated?)
e.
Is
it measurable? (Did you include specific milestones
or even target dates for the goals? Each goal needs to be something you can evaluate and ensure you are heading in the right
direction.)
f.
Is
it achievable? (Set goals that are realistic,
but challenging. Ask God to help you to have the strength and wisdom to work on each goal.)
3. Carefully consider individual goals for each family member. Make goals in three areas,
spiritual, personal and academic each year:
EXAMPLE of goals for a child:
Spiritual – self
control over emotions and tongue
Personal – maintain responsibility over belongings
(coats, piano bags, sports equipment)
Academic – have multiplication and division
tables memorized through 12
4.
Post
these in a spot where you can see them regularly and pick a goal to work on weekly or monthly. Include your children and let
them pick the goal they want to work on that week.
L.
Post / Display your finalized Family Mission Statement in a central
location and make it a habit to revisit it frequently. A family mission statement can be a very powerful tool for any person
or family as long as you use it and keep it a center of your focus.
M.
Take extra steps to reinforce the
Mission Statement:
i. Use your Mission Statement in your
family devotions. Consider this example: After creating and reviewing your Family Mission
Statement, have each person write down a paragraph beginning, "Lord, help me to
…" Go around the table and read your paragraphs in prayer to God.
ii. Is there a verse in the Bible that complements your purpose statement? Make
it your family verse.
iii. How about a prayer that reflects your goals as a family?
iv. How about designing a family crest which illustrates the primary objectives
of your Family Mission Statement?
v. How about setting your Mission Statement to music?
vi. Have everyone memorize it and quote it at certain times??
vii. Start a scrapbook and/or journal and record instances where you or your family
members were “caught” fulfilling your purpose?
viii. Create activities or “family projects” which will help you fulfill your purpose and complete one project a month or week?
ix. During your Family Devotions ask
family members to share how they lived up to the Family Mission?
x. Practice! When someone obviously
fails to live up the Family Mission, “erase” that scene, back up, and
let them practice again. When they get it right, lavish them with praise.
EXAMPLE: Suppose your three year old is struggling to learn obedience, while your eleven year old wrestles
with godly communication. When an infraction occurs, dole out the necessary discipline. Afterwards, take ten minutes and practice
making better choices. Make a game out of it! Say, "Okay, you go hide in the other room, then let's see how fast you can come
when Mama calls your name." Do this three or four times, while cheering and clapping like a maniac each time they get it right.
Or
say, "How could you make that same request without whining?" or "When my answer to one of your requests is no, how might you
communicate your disappointment without talking back or arguing?" Practice a few times, then celebrate with ice-cream sandwiches
or something.
It's
fine to penalize behavior that conflicts with your mission as a family … but perhaps the best learning occurs when we
practice making better choices in a relaxed setting.
CONCLUSION:
·
What is your purpose in life?
o Will you consider writing out a “Purpose Statement” for yourself?
o Will you consider developing a “Purpose Statement” for your family?
·
We NEED to know our purpose in
life!
o Many people are drifting through life without much purpose or direction!!
o "More men fail through lack
of purpose than lack of talent." - Billy
Sunday.
EXAMPLE:
Christians without goals are a little like Alice in the fairy tale Alice in Wonderland. In a conversation between her
and the Cheshire Cat, Alice asked, "Would you tell me please, which way I ought to go from here?" "That depends a good deal
on where you want to get to," said the cat. "I don't much care where," said Alice. "Then it doesn't matter which way you go,"
said the cat. Source Unknown.
PASTOR’S FINAL WORD: The ultimate goal of creating a Mission Statement for yourself and/or your family is NOT so that you’ll end up with a piece of paper on the wall. The goal is to stop and consider your life
– where you’re headed and where you want to be when it’s all said and done. A Mission Statement can be a
guiding principle to help with all your choices and keep you focused on what’s really important in life. A Mission Statement
can offer you a vision of the great things God can do and challenge you in your daily priorities to “stay with your dream”. I am convinced that if you’ll discover and embrace your personal mission that
God will use YOU and/or your family to make a real difference in this world!
Pastor’s Note: Please understand that these notes were derived from hours of research. Many books, articles,
and websites were consulted and many of the ideas are borrowed from others. Although I have attempted to give credit for direct
quotes, other footnotes may have been unintentionally omitted. I have not knowingly attempted to steal anyone’s material.
Please use these notes with the understanding that many of the ideas are not original to me.
