Thanks Jack

Kinda on the mean side but challenging

Border Patrol Game

http://www.resist.com/other/border_patrol.swf

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Thanks Amanda amanda@worldstart.com

Great Learning Games for Kids (and Adults Too!)

http://www.learninggamesforkids.com/

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My Happy Holidays Web now in service – Jim

http://mysite.verizon.net/jhurray/Jokes+Special/Holidays/XmasWeb/Xmas2009.htm

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Thanks Amusingfacts.com

The Fact

Daytime dramas are called Soap Operas because they were originally used to advertise soap powder. In America in the early days of TV, advertisers would write stories around the use of their soap powder.

Soap Operas

Soap operas appear to be a law unto themselves, when it comes to such things as love, loyalty, gestation of children, and abruptly terminating the lives and loves of their characters.

These unique, and highly addictive television programs have one feature that sets them apart from the weekly drama, or other, even semi-serious shows - their plots are ongoing, to the extent that one never knows when a storyline comes to an end, and another begins.

For the most part, soap operas broadcast in the afternoons, because in the beginning, they were meant to entertain the ordinary housewife, who would be home cooking and cleaning at that hour, hence the term "daytime soaps", or "serials". But in the 70s and 80s came a wave of evening shows with a little more glitz, and some glamorous names, but the same tried and true shenanigans on both sides of the bedroom door. These became known as "prime time soaps".

But soap operas were not an invention of television. They actually began broadcasting over radio in the 1920s, and with the advent of television in the 1940s, carried on from there.

They became known as "soap" operas, because with a target audience of women working in the home, basics of homemaking/cleaning were big advertisers, and one of the biggest were laundry and personal soaps.

The melodramatic storylines haven't changed much, but the audience demographics have, and now the commercial advertisements could be anything from hemorrhoid relief to "the little blue pill".

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A boy frog telephones the Psychic Hotline and the psychic tells him:"You are going to meet a pretty young girl who will want to know everything about you."

The frog is thrilled. "This is great! Will I meet her at a party?"

"No," says the psychic, "in her biology class."

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Thanks Alice K.

All too rarely, airline attendants make an effort to make the in-flight "safety lecture" and announcements a bit more entertaining. Here are some real examples that have been heard or reported:

On a Southwest flight (SW has no assigned seating, you just sit where you want) passengers were apparently having a hard time choosing, when a flight attendant announced, "People, people we're not picking out furniture here, find a seat and get in it!"

On a Continental Flight with a very "senior" flight attendant crew, the pilot said, "Ladies and gentlemen, we've reached cruising altitude and will be turning down the cabin lights. This is for your comfort and to enhance the appearance of your flight attendants."

On landing, the stewardess said, "Please be sure to take all of your belongings. If you're going to leave anything, please make sure it's something we'd like to have."

There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but there are only 4 ways out of this airplane"

"Thank you for flying Delta Business Express. We hope you enjoyed giving us the business as much as we enjoyed taking you for a ride."

As the plane landed and was coming to a stop at Ronald Reagan, a lone voice came over the loudspeaker: "Whoa, big fella WHOA!"

"Your seat cushions can be used for flotation; and, in the event of an emergency water landing, please paddle to shore and take them with our compliments."

"As you exit the plane, make sure to gather all of your belongings. Anything left behind will be distributed evenly among the flight attendants. Please do not leave children or spouses."

And from the pilot during his welcome message: "Delta Airlines is pleased to have some of the best flight attendants in the industry. Unfortunately, none of them are on this flight!"

Another flight attendant's comment on a less than perfect landing: "We ask you to please remain seated as Captain Kangaroo bounces us to the terminal."

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Thanks Good Clean Funnies

Leftovers

Thanksgiving Short Jokes

What did the turkey say before it was roasted? Boy, I'm stuffed!

Why did the police arrest the turkey? They suspected it of foul play!

Which side of the turkey has the most feathers? The outside!

Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building? Yes. A building can't jump at all!

If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? Pilgrims!

What type of music did the Pilgrims like? Plymouth Rock!

Why did the turkey cross the road? It was the chicken's day off!

What key has legs and can't open doors? A turkey!

What's the best thing to put into pumpkin pie? Your teeth!

Received from John.