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The Stuhmer's Bread Commercial
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Introduction: Famous for its pumpernickel bread, the Stuhmer Baking Company published an annual Jewish almanac as a matanah, or gift, to its customers. Along with the usual calendrical information, Stuhmer's Almanac contained the lyrics to the "Star-Spangled Banner" and "Hatikvah" and the texts of assorted prayers, including yizkor and the Friday-evening kiddush. "Our friends tell us that they look forward to its helpful contents each year," the company proudly noted. (Source of the foregoing was on Forward.com, but is no longer on the Internet)

The Stuhmer Baking Company used to advertise their famous bread on Radio Station WEVD (1330 AM), back in the days when it was known as the Station that speaks your language. (Today it is ESPN Sports Radio.)

I remember that, while driving from our native state of Maine down to New York City during the years 1953-56, my late father would try to tune our car's radio to WEVD. He did this just as soon as we approached the New York metropolitan area, because he was anxious to hear the humorous Stuhmer's Bread commercial that aired on WEVD.

The commercial went like this:

Voice 1: Oy-yoy-yoy-yoy-yoy-yoy-yoy -- boikh-veytik!
(Translation: Oy-yoy-yoy-yoy-yoy-yoy-yoy -- a stomach-ache!)

Voice 2: Du host boikh-veytik? Gut af dir! Dos iz farvos du host nit gegesn Stuhmer's broit!!! Ven du volst hobn gegesn Stuhmer's broit, volstu ken boikh-veytik nit gehat!

(Translation: You've got a stomach-ache? Good for you! That's because you didn't eat Stuhmer's bread!!! If you would have eaten Stuhmer's bread, you wouldn't have gotten a stomach ache!)