Texas Dream Home Turns Into Nightmare

Call me sadistic, but this cracks me up. This "lucky" guy wins a $1.5 million home and boy, is it nice. Only problem is, when you win that much money (house = money), guess what? You get to pay the taxes (money = tax). $663,000 is what he owes (0 - 663000 = ouch). Now, how do you solve that math problem? (lucky guy - house = not broke).

Realtors in Tyler must be about to bust a gut.

The Governor of Illinois is a Moron

There. I've said it. Illinois, or more accurately Chicago, is the nexus of everything that is wrong with gun control efforts. The politicians and lawyers are so busy lining their pockets that they've completely discarded any and all logic with respect to firearm laws. As a consequence, they now suffer one of the nation's highest gun crime rates. Nice work, boys!

Now the governor is requiring firearms licenses (already hard enough to get) for the purchase of stun guns.

Once again, the illogic is that law-abiding citizens will comply with this new law, and because this new law has now made it more difficult for law-abiding citizens to acquire a stun gun, whattya suppose happens next?

“By requiring background checks and a waiting period, we can assure Illinois citizens that these powerful devices do not fall into the wrong hands,” said Representative Elaine Nekritz.

Huh? How does it do that, exactly?

Congratulations, your Honorable Bone-Headedness - you've just created a new black market, and a brand-new class of criminal, all for no good reason.

You people in Illinois need to wake up, and vote these parasites out of your lives.

Grandfather kills leopard with his hands

The next time you think you're all bad, remember this story. Grandpa gots a new rug.

M'Mburugu had a machete in one hand but dropped that to thrust his fist down the leopard's mouth. He gradually managed to pull out the animal's tongue, leaving it in its death-throes.

Perry Caught Using Vulgar Language On Tape

Hey - he's the governor. He can say what he wants. Besides, "AMF" is a time-honored traditional farewell here in the Great State of Texas.

House Approves Flag-Burning Amendment

I personally don't think we need an amendment to protect the long haired, maggot infested hippies, losers, and malcontents when they choose to burn Old Glory.

As long as MY Constitutional Right of freedom of speech is allowed to be expressed by stomping the ever loving shee-it out of them.

Brain Areas Shut Off During Female Orgasm

'During orgasm, there was strong, enormous deactivation in the brain. During fake orgasm, there was no deactivation of the brain at all. None,' Holstege said.

So, how can you tell when a woman's faking an orgasm? Who cares?!?

Rush Hour Accident in Oklahoma

No word on whether alcohol was involved, or if mullets were injured in the accident.

ABC News: Mom Demands Recall of Daughter's School Yearbook

Anybody see this on Good Morning America? This 11-year-old girl hates her school yearbook photo which will be seen by 200 kids and their families, so what's the logical thing to do?

Make a huge stink of it with the media, and get the very same picture she hates posted all over the Internets, where millions will see how selfish, petty, and stupid you really are. I'm just doing a public service by passing this on:

Texas May Be U.S. Top Watermelon Producer

Yessir, if you're looking for the place with the most melons, we're #1. And they're good for you, too.

"It really is more nutrient-packed than people realize," said Tara Gidus, a dietitian in Orlando, Fla. "It's high in vitamin A, vitamin E, and lycopene. The thing I like about it too is it's kid-friendly."

Amen, sister. Amen.

Democrats Block Attempt to Confirm Bolton

I think Mr. Voinovich needs a serious ass-kicking. Or, maybe he should stop being a RINO and just switch parties.

Charges Against Teen Upgraded After Dog He Allegedly Raped Dies

I don't know what is more horrid.

The fact that this butt-cheese raped a dog.

OR

The fact that the same douchebag also raped two little girls and yet the entire bulk of this story is that a dog was raped. It's almost as if the author of this story finds raping girls to be somewhat normal and practically acceptable behavior and that raping the dog is the big story. The two little girls he raped are mentioned in two sentances. Un-freaking-believable.

This punk kid needs to be taken out to the landfill and shot in the back of the head. I'm sure he'll walk because his mommy was mean to him, or his coach in high school humiliated him in public.

This frankly disgusts me, and that takes a lot.