Going Postal
or
Pickin' the cinders from my chin.
March 2006
Well, not quite going postal but post failure...causing me to go nearly postal. Here's the Tale...I set up my 70s Zeus frameset as a fixie. Lovely bicycle...see the following page for the full descript on the Zeus Fixie... click here ....Ok. So I got the bike all decked out in its most sweetness. Sweetness, of course, is purely subjective and I am easy to please so I was happy with my final outcome per dollar spent on this project.
Now I had the bicycle on several try out runs and warm ups around my short loop where I live to test features like alignment, noise, function, stem height, seat height, etc, etc...many little loops to perfect the ride of my spanish beauty and I was quite sure I had it dialed in to perfection for me. So set about for a spin on one of those brief and rare March moments in Pa where it is warm enough to get out and get it kicked up a notch on the bike.
Spinning down the first hill...I paced my legs into the groove to backpedal just enough to maintain that speed control...my first downhill from the house is quite a buzz...quite steep when climbing but luckily it has two areas of leveling to appear almost like some GIANT's steps. Each time you reach a step you can skip the rear a little to taper off the speed...especially since I decided to set up the Zeus without brakes. I am currently rethinking this aspect...the Dawes Grasser has shown its reliablity in this non-brake department but the Zeus...well...read on.
So I set about keeping speed in check, rounding about the 90 degree bend at the base of my hill...along the flat and another 90er. pull up...stop and spin off left and down the road...so far it is exquisitely perfect. no noise, gentle pedaling in smooth strokes to make me smile and remember I have the gearing spot on! So the ride is buzzing along nicely in the warm spring-like weather...a few more days of this pleasantry from the meteorologist then back to the bone chill that has become the norm for most Pennsylvania winters...by far, this has been a pleasant winter. I normally have piled on about 90 or so Cross country ski days but with this winter and the lack of consistent snowfall...I have been held to less than 25 ski days...which means less snow...but still cold weather and a few nice days scattered in between...all of this makes for the potential bicycle ride highly favorable except for one fact...the strange weather is playing a tap dance on my health this year with bouts of colds and flu days that seem to be keeping my cycling under the radar!
So I am back to rolling down the roadway, up a short climb...nice smooth transition to climbing, perfect function, all is well with this day and this fine machine as I make a gentle right and begin to really give her hell and barrel down the Route! All seems to be in harmony as I pedal into about my fourth mile on the fixie. I have settled into a comfortable pace, have determined the stem is perfect, the wheels perfectly tuned, the alignment ideal...the seat height....SNAP. what the *&$%....
With no time to prepare...be warned...just no time...I drop fast and hard to the cinder covered rural roadway...Thank God there's no traffic...
The feeling of having a seatpost snap: I had flashbacks afterward of Altoona. A rider in the Tour De Toona had a post break...and ended up with a colostomy...OUCH. I remember the sound first...clear distinct, bone jarring...SNAP...Very excruciatingly loud and yet so fast you have no time to prepare...my right leg already on the downstroke movement, the saddle falls quickly to the right as my thigh and pelvic bone crash in a crushing like style to the top tube...all the while my legs are still turning with the fixed movement of the wheel as I finally go sideways over, head lightly skimming the cinders, I hold the bike upward with my legs and skid on my back for what seems like the length of a football field yet probably only spans 15 foot or so...but the pain along my scraped back reminds me it was indeed far enough...thus I begin picking cinders out of my chin.
The bike was unharmed overall...a slight flat spot on the rear tubbie tire but no harm. I gently lower it into the high grass to my right where I almost landed in a large field...probably would have been better had I, slightly more cushion and less trauma to my chin and back...I would much rather pry straw and local flora from my mouth than dirt and gravel. My eyes shoot around from side to side...finding the seat with part of post still attached...a clean sever directly across the post. clean cut. looks like a machined part! frightening...too bad....it was a Zeus post as well. The seat was a cheapie I had tossed on at the last moment of changing my mind...I took the old saddle off the shelf and figured I would put it on for the daily rider and let the Zeus saddle rest on the shelf...good choice! The seat was junked...I had no where to put the post and seat for my now strenuous and uncomfortable ride home so I tossed it into the field...part anger...part knowing where it is so I can retrieve later...
I assess the situation, look over the bicycle carefully...remove what little of the post remains so as not to make the mistake of seating upon it for the trip homeward. Then I begin...
4 miles home. standing mostly on a fixie...without a seat...what a lesson in humility and test of strength. I bitch and moan the whole way home. I decide to dance it mostly like I am "picking up the pace" or "climbing the cole"...either way it hurts and gets very very tiring on the fixie. on a few non-highly travelled flats I set myself on the top tube but it just doesn't work...no rest with the constant pedalling...It was a tortuous ride. The only real relief came on the very steep climbs heading home where my muscles actually had to put out strength effort to climb...it slightly relieved the tense and knots in them...it wasn't easy or fun...or fast...it was just a hell of a ride home. The ride alone could cause me to write on and on about the knees feeling like they would burst with every revolution...every little downhill caused my back to ache and hamstrings and quads to burn to hold back the rolling...it was terrible. It was a relief to roll into the driveway and climb off the bike. I was whipped. I attribute some to being out of shape for the season and some to the accident that sapped some energy and left me a bit rattled...but the standing itself really took a toll.
The Aftermath: I put another new post into the seat tube...no harm. I mounted up a different saddle. I am in the process of tweaking and checking once again...and also reconsidering the need for at least one brake! In my area, with the downhills...sometimes exceeding 50 mph on a regular roadie...it will be good to use a brake no doubt. So I will place one soon. I also have to honestly believe...it the post would have snapped and I would have had a rear brake to hit...the fall might not have occured...with a front brake and my energy already heading violently in that direction....I would have probably planted headlong a great deal quicker and less forgiving...but I will never know for sure...nor do I want to ever find out.
So I caution those out there to inspect there rides carefully...don't take a creak for granted...you never know what it could be...look for cracks as well and even though we are careful...we can never truly prevent all failures as I found out. The post that failed was a vintage Zeus post probably dating to the early 80s. It was unused...New old stock and in the box when I got it and applied it. So just be careful...or you may be teethless....
I bid a farewell! Keep riding and more talk soon...