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December 1997 Newsletter |
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TM Copyright © 1997 - 2000 Luis Arellano, III. All
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December
1997
from
THE ARELLANO FAMILY!
COMPULSIVE CHRISTMAS HOUSECLEANING. Barb
was wiping down the walls. She
said with a hint of frustration, "I've been cleaning these walls,
but I'm not getting any dirt."
I suggested, "Well,
stop, then." She
countered, "I can't. I'm
almost done now."
WHAT'S IN A YEAR?
After serving dinner to a ladies
group at the church, it was the men's turn to sit down and eat.
About ten of us began chatting.
Barry Sine mentioned he is involved with the "Year 2000
Project." His
formidable task is to prevent older mainframe computers from going
haywire at the turn of the century.
I said, "You
guys are all worried about the year Two Thousand, but you're really
being very shortsighted. What
happens when we turn the year Ten Thousand?"
Everybody laughed. I
argued, "You know,
thirty years ago, somebody asked what they would do when the year Two
Thousand arrived, and everybody laughed then, too!"
Barry chuckled, "Hey, if we're still using these antiquated
computers by then, shame on us!"
Always ready to beat a dead horse, I continued, "You know,
Barry, it gets even worse: You'll
have to do it all over a third time unless you plan now for the year One
Hundred Thousand!"
VERY
LONG-TERM.
To emphasize my commitment to
our customers, I closed an alarm monitoring renewal letter with the
sentence, "We look forward to serving you into the 21st Century and
beyond."
My brother, Jim said, while
tuning his radio, a talk show discussing coffins caught his interest.
The caller was saying how the law has changed, and you're no
longer required to buy the coffin from your funeral director.
"You could mail order it yourself and have it
delivered." He
continued, "The best one is a plain pine box, because an airtight
seal is not necessary. You
could spend a fortune but you don't have to unless you want.
They have some brass ones with a 25 year warranty, and you can
even get one with a lifetime warranty!"
We burst into laughter and couldn't stop.
Gasping for breath, I asked,
"How you check to find out if the box you bought is
lasting?"
WHAT'S IN A TAPE?
My office has some equipment I
use for editing tapes. Because
I'm a Railroad Buff, I also have my scanner fed into my wireless
earphones so I can keep up on the train action while listening to music. (That was a great gift from Mike. I can wander all around the house and I even work
outside wearing it.) Early
in December, Barb and I bought CD of seasonal music.
I copied it onto a cassette tape so Barb could enjoy it in her
car. A couple of days
later, she complained there were voices coming through her cassette
player. I said, "Let me hear it." A few seconds into the tape, I heard the Lehigh Dispatcher,
"TV3, right along at Bethlehem."
The whole tape was riddled with railroad radio traffic!
It seems I had my mixer miswired, and in a grand voice-over faux
pas, I dubbed the dispatchers from six different railroads onto her
Christmas music!
REPAIR vs. REPLACE Department.
If
you want to know how to please a woman, get this:
The plastic liner inside the refrigerator door broke, and things
were falling off the sagging, fractured shelves all over the floor.
I went to the parts distributor and ordered a new one.
While it was on my mind, I picked up a new switch and a bulb for
the interior light.
IT SEEMS whenever
I upgrade our phone service, there is some unexpected result.
I previously wrote about our experiences with Bell Atlantic's
"Return Call." This
year, right after I installed the Caller ID box, I used the business
line to ring up the house line for a test.
Amused, Barb read the display out loud.
"Arellano Alarms... Mmm.
Now we should ask somebody else to call us."
After thinking about the purpose of the service, I smiled,
"So we can see who they are?"
"OBNOXIOUS" is the
password one of my customers once used for her security system.
"My son gave it to me so I used it."
Shocked, I asked, "You mean he calls you that?"
She laughed. "No,
the last time he gave me something like that I didn't take it and he got
upset. He doesn't call me
that."
STICKY NOTE DEPARTMENT.
It's hard to imagine all the
thoughts, reminders and interpersonal communications that went by the
wayside before the era of those handy little Sticky Notes. The ubiquitous little devils have taken over my office,
the kitchen, all my computer terminals and essentially our whole lives -
at least mine. Anything
that needs any kind of attention whatsoever or has anything about it
that ought to be known is flagged! They
are everywhere! They afford
some interesting insights on life:
NOTE
ON CAKE: "This
wasn't a birthday cake, was it? If
so, it will need some reconstructive surgery."
BARB
is a Card Merchandiser for Hallmark.
She wrote herself a sticky note and put it by the phone. "Q: Goose bumps display.
When should it come down?"
Unable to resist, I appended the reply, "A: When you stop
shivering."
LOU'S
POETRY DEPARTMENT
"Barb vacuumed.
The pile of our powder blue bedroom carpet was smoothed out in
straight rows like a newly paved parking lot."
"Setting up and customizing
Windows 95 is like teaching a dog to do a thousand tricks."
[I make no secret of my dislike of the computer
"mouse." The jerk
who developed it was a "rat."]
BARB'S
"BAD" DEFINITIONS:
Bad hair day.
(You
know what that's like.)
Bad bang day.
(Just
the bangs misbehave.)
Bad eye day.
(Allergies
act up.)
IT'S "DOG EAT DOG."
Our
man, Dave said to me over the phone, "I'd better take lunch now,
because the telephone guy has to work right next to me, and I'm really hungry."
BETTER LATE THAN NEVER
DEPARTMENT. Working
at the kitchen cook top, Barb leaned forward and bumped her forehead on
the rim of the hood fan. "Ouch!"
(That hood fan is one of the few admitted design errors I
committed when building our house. All of us have clunked our heads on it uncountable times.)
I looked at her and offered a very sincere, "Sorry."
Through tears of pain, she looked bewildered and asked, "Why
are you saying you're sorry?"
I said, "Well... I put it there."
Sarcastically, she remarked, "Right.
Twenty years ago. It's
a little late to say you're sorry."
HAIR TODAY, CORN TOMORROW.
My barber alarmed me with advice
I had a small bald spot in the back.
She assured me it was a common, temporary occurrence and that it
would grow back in. Later,
I showed it to Barb. After
a few seconds of examination, she remarked, "It looks like one of
those marks they're always finding in the cornfields."
FREUDIAN FRIDAY.
Driving by T.G.I. Friday's
window, I meant to ask Barb, "See anybody you know?"
Instead, it came out, "See
anybody you like?"
I have had an extremely busy year with my business, Reliance Alarm Company. (The electronic security business has always been feast or famine.) We've had a significant installation backlog and a brisk service schedule. Back in 1980, I was one of the few independent alarm dealers using computers and mobile phones. I got away from the mobile phones for a while, but last year, we got some cell phones, which are helping us handle the increased business. Because decreasing rates have finally made it justifiable, I also added an 800 phone number. One of the big satisfactions was to beat the credit card surcharges when we call the office from a customer's premise or a pay phone. Alas, the FCC has just authorized a 30-cent surcharge for calls originating from pay phones, wiping out those savings.
AND NOW… VIDEO! For
years I have enjoyed audio taping school concerts and other assorted
events. My hobby took a new
direction when I bought a used video camera for $75 at a yard sale.
A couple of new batteries and some minor repairs brought it back
to life. My primary
objective was to videotape railroad activity, however, I have found that
people love to see themselves and their families on tape.
I have developed quite a home video library.
I love building and working with
my computers, and have begun to use Creative Wave Studio to edit and
patch audiotapes of the events I record.
The next goal is to edit my videotapes by computer. I help at the church "Clubs" with the third
grade boys' group, and have continued singing in the choir this year.
All these years Barb has been raking the autumn leaves by hand,
with very little assistance. Since she was very busy with her jobs, I took care of the
leaves for her this year. (I
suffer from an obsessive-compulsive syndrome.
Once I got started, I was a
"Man with a Mission.")
I had no idea our trees had grown so big and were producing such
an increasing volume of leaves.
No wonder Barb dreaded raking!
BARBARA
especially enjoys gardening and walking.
She prefers walking through a nearby cemetery, because she
"likes the people there," even though we were never acquainted
with anyone buried there. Once
on a walk, we were discussing where we want to be buried.
I said, "We have a family plot available in South Canaan,
but I think I might prefer a good view of the railroad."
She said, "Don't
bury me with a bunch of strangers. Bury me here. I
feel like I know these people better."
She currently has two occupations, Homemaker and Card Merchandiser (for three stores selling Ambassador Cards). One of her stores is rumored to be closing, and her favorite, the Thrift Drug, has been sold to Eckerd and is slated to change over to another card company. With a Wal-Mart and a new Acme under construction in Quakertown, perhaps one of those may fill the gap.
MIKE, 21,
is studying music at Temple University.
He loves his studies and living in the city.
One of his reasons for transferring to Temple University is that
it has more of a "Music Scene" than existed at Ithaca, which
is good for establishing connections and getting gigs.
In the summer, he and his roommate, Tim Cloonan set up off campus
housing on S. 9th Street. It's
a two-level flat, with a fireplace and high ceilings on the main floor
and red brick arches lending a warm feel to the kitchen and dining area.
With such high ceilings, his walls are looking forward to some
large tapestries or artwork, and the volume of furniture, as you would
expect in one's "first" apartment, is not proportionate to the
square footage. He recently
gave several paid performances as part of an ensemble at the grand
opening of Temple U's new Apollo Arena.
His group was shown in a spot on the evening news.
I videotaped him when he played backup for the Jazz Vocal
Workshop and when he performed an excellent original composition in the
Jazz Composers' Workshop. Mike
is working at The Sign of the Sorrel Horse Restaurant to help pay his
rent. He was recently promoted to Chef! He enjoys cooking, and for Christmas has suggested a
few professional quality utensils for his home kitchen. He is also saving up for a Pat Metheney guitar by Ibanez.
DAVID, 19,
spent his freshman year at Bloomsburg University.
His declared major was Audio Recording Technology, however, the
hands-on studio part of it wasn't scheduled to begin until the summer
after the first year, and he grew frustrated waiting.
Meanwhile, a friend suggested that he check out another school he
had attended. Enthused
about it, David left Bloomsburg University and enrolled at a premiere
technical school called Full Sail Center for the Recording Arts,
in Winter Park, Florida. He
moved down into an apartment complex a
couple of weeks before school started, with his new roommate,
Eric Watkin. He absolutely loves what he is doing! He wants to be number one in his class, and so far,
he's making the "A's." At
Thanksgiving, he came home brimming with new ideas and ambition - and
wanting all sorts of expensive mixers, recorders and microphones for
Christmas! His
computer, an old one from my office, was definitely un-cool with its
2400 baud modem. I got some fresh internal goodies, including a 56k modem
(faster than even mine), so it will be more "like it" on The
Web. He brought the old
computer back for reconstruction at Christmas break.
It doesn't seem to have traveled well.
When I turned it on to transfer his files, the hard drive had a
death rattle, sort of like a washing machine full of marbles.
Bye bye, disk! He has driven to Florida and back twice.
Before he came home for Thanksgiving, I sent him one of our cell
phones in case of an emergency. It arrived on time, but there was nobody home to sign for it,
so it spent the holiday in the UPS warehouse.
Before he left for the return trip to Florida, I gave him a
second cell phone. Good
thing! His alternator quit near Savanna, and he limped into the Savanna
Airport parking lot. He
left a message on our answering machine around 5:00 AM Sunday, looking
for help to analyze the problem. I
spent the day glued to the phone, offering technical and moral support,
and calling him regularly to check on his progress.
He managed the repairs very well, and I am glad to see he is
capable of dealing with mechanical problems.
And that forlorn cell phone waiting at Winter Park?
It came in handy: David's
roommate, Eric used it to meet up with him out on the road!
While the episode may have been traumatic for David, it will be
an experience to fall back on when he or someone else he knows has a
breakdown on the road.
We hope you are doing well and
wish you a Joyous Christmas and a Blessed New Year!
With Love,
Barb, Lou, Mike & Dave
P.S. Spread the Good News of Christmas to all!