Mary Rose's Garden

The Discipline of Self Esteem

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If you google "Discipline of Self-Esteem", you get a page full of links- this one on the bottom of the page.  All of the other links, are about how disciplining your child improves self-esteem.  This concept is different.  It is the opposite.  This concept is about how believing in yourself, loving yourself, and caring for yourself- in short developing your sense of self-esteem- leads to a positive self-discipline and positive care for others.  There is no scientific study to prove this- this is an N of 1 case study.  But I believe that this is Truth.
 
If you are a survivor of trauma, you are like a beautiful rose.  Roses survive winter just thorns and cut-back branches.  Then spring comes, water flows, sun shines, and the plant springs into bloom with the most beautiful flowers imaginable.  We are like that.  We can live with the effects of winter all our lives- or we can spring into bloom and among the most beautiful of flowers- somehow more beautiful because of the compassion we've developed and the lessons that we have learned.  Try reading these things, incorporating them into your own life and see what happens.  Be a rose!!

My blog on Living the Discipline of Self Esteem

On being a "Mary Rose"

What is the Discipline of Self-Esteem?

The Wonder Child- the Beginning of the Concept

The Princess of the Universe Gets Book-Learning

Swimming Through the Air

The Angels and the Tigers

The Addition Principle

There But For the Grace of God...

Sometimes it takes more courage to tell a fabulous truth about yourself than to tell about the nightmares.  Maybe that's why we don't hear more stories like the two below.  I spent more than 20 years not wanting to know my own fabulous truth.  Believe it or not- it's up to you.  Laugh at it or not- that is your perogative.  My Mom told me as a child that at the end of this age, Jesus is going to open up the book of life and all truth will be known- everything that we ever wanted to hide- everything that we never knew.  I do not want people to see me as a foolish coward- hiding from facts that most people would scream from the roof tops- choosing to fail rather than succeed- choosing to live without hope rather than to live with pride and dignity.  I am not a coward, a liar, or a boaster.  I am a Mary Rose.  And at the end of this age, I hope that you won't see anything that I haven't shared with the world.  My struggle is our struggle, my joys- our joys, and my victory over my fears, my hurt, my shortcomings is humanity's victory.  And the same is true for you.

Billion Dollar Seeds

Ducks Geese and Swans

Helpless, Hopeless, and Useless

Issues and causes important to me in this world

If you like what you have read and want to let me know or want to encourage me to keep writing more, then send me an e-mail.  Please put DOSE or ROSE in the subject line.  Thanks for your interest.

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Dedication:

 

These writings are dedicated to Marie Rose Ferron, the original "Mary Rose".  As a small child in Woonsocket RI, she was asked by the bishop to pray that a heresy that was rampant in the diocese to be eliminated.  She prayed and it was gone.

 

At age 12, she was stricken with polio and was unable to move from the neck down.  About all that she could do from that point on, was to accept her sufferings with grace and dignity, and offer her prayers to the world, for the sake of her beloved Jesus.

 

He rewarded her with the gift of bearing the signs of his own suffering on earth- but while the suffering for the sake of the world was welcomed by this dear soul- the fame and attention that came with the suffering was not.  So she prayed to have the pain remain, but that all visible signs of the stigmata be removed- and the Lord granted her request.

 

When my mother married, she was told by her physician that she and my father would never be able to have children.  My father had suffered from rheumatic fever as a child, so was likely to have a low sperm count, and my mother had broken her back as a child in such a way that impregnation was almost impossible.  A blessed nun gave my Mom a tiny relic of Marie Rose's bone and she began a novena to have children over and over again.  She promised Marie Rose, that if she should have the gift of children, then she would name her first daughter after her and dedicate her life to Marie Roses' memory.   I was born less than one year later.  My mother had seven children, thirteen grandchildren, and 4 great grandchildren (and counting).

 

Did my Mom keep her promise?  It turned out that Mary was my maternal grandmother's name and Rose was my grandmother's sister's name.  My father's mother was very insulted that his side of the family would not be recognized in the birth of their first child- so I was named Mary Karline (as Karline was my grandmother's name in German).  But my Mom told me the story, and I took Rose for my confirmation name and added it to all the documents except my driver's license. 

 

Many years passed.   Then one day, I decided that I did not want to be "Mary" anymore.  Mary was the name of the child and the woman who had been a victim of family violence her whole life.  I did not want to be a victim any more, I wanted a new life and a new name.  That is why I insist on being "Mary Rose".

 

Here is a link to the shrine dedicated to Marie Rose Ferron.

Little Rose's Shrine

Marie Rose Ferron Novena Prayer