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Agents' Chapter 1 Pet Peeves!
Posted
by Chuck Sambuchino http://www.guidetoliteraryagents.com/blog/
The Sept/Oct/08
issue of Writer's Digest magazine has a piece in it that I wrote on literary agents' chapter 1 pet peeves. For
it, I basically just contacted a whole bunch of agents - new and experienced, fiction and nonfiction, Christian and not, juvenile
and adult - and asked them all what they hate to see in chapter 1.
They gave a lot of great feedback - real
good practical stuff touching on cliches and pet peeves and overused beginnings. The article will be online in
several weeks, so you can see a lot of great advice soon.
Although we saved plenty of juicy parts for the WD
article, in the meantime, enjoy all this great feedback that didn't make the final cut for space purposes!
Agents Chapter 1 Pet Peeves:
"Most
agents hate prologues. Just make the first chapter relevant and well written." - Andrea
Brown, Andrea Brown Literary Agency
"Slow writing with a lot of description puts me off very quickly. I like a
first chapter that moves quickly and draws me in so I'm immediately hooked." - Andrea
Hurst, Andrea Hurst Literary Management
"Avoid any description of the weather."
- Denise Marcil, Denise Marcil Literary Agency
"I don't like it when the main character dies at the end of Chapter
1. Why did I just spend all this time with this character? I feel cheated." -
Cricket Freeman, August Agency
"A cheesy hook drives me nuts. They say 'Open with a hook!' to grab the reader.
That's true, but there's a fine line between an intriguing hook and one that's just silly. An example of a silly hook would
be opening with a line of overtly sexual dialogue. Or opening with a hook that's just too convoluted to be truly interesting."
- Daniel Lazar, Writers House
" 'The Weather' is always a problem - the author feels he has to
set up the scene and tell us who the characters are, etc. I like starting a story in media res."
- Elizabeth Pomada, Larsen-Pomada Literary Agents
"Anything
cliché such as ‘It was a dark and stormy night’ will turn me off. I hate when a narrator or author addresses
the reader (e.g., 'Gentle reader')." - Jennie Dunham, Dunham Literary
"Sometimes
a reasonably good writer will create an interesting character and describe him in a compelling way, but then he’ll turn
out to be some unimportant bit player. Other annoying, unoriginal things I see too often: some young person going home to
a small town for a funeral, someone getting a phone call about a death, a description of a psycho lurking in the shadows,
or a terrorist planting a bomb." - Ellen Pepus, Ellen Pepus Literary Agency
"I’m really turned off by a protagonist named Isabelle who goes by 'Izzy.' No. Really. I am."
- Stephany Evans, FinePrint Literary Management
"I dislike opening scenes that you think
are real (I rep adult genre fiction), then the protagonist wakes up. It makes me feel cheated. And so many writers use
this hackneyed device. I dislike lengthy paragraphs of world building and scene setting up front. I usually crave action
close to the beginning of the book (and so do readers)." - Laurie McLean,
Larsen/Pomada Literary Agents
"I do in fact hate it when someone wakes up from a dream in Chapter 1, and I dislike
an overly long prologue. The worst thing that you can do is let that crucial chapter be boring - that’s the chapter
that has to grab my interest!" - Michelle Brower, Wendy Sherman Associates
"I
don't like an opening line that's 'My name is...,' introducing the narrator to the reader so blatantly. I might be prompted
to groan before reading on a bit further to see if the narration gets any less stale. There are far better ways in Chapter
1 to establish an instant connection between narrator and reader. I’m also usually not a fan of prologues, preferring
to find myself in the midst of a moving plot on page 1 rather than being kept outside of it, or eased into it."
- Michelle Andelman, Andrea Brown Literary Agency
"I hate seeing a 'run-down list:' Names,
hair color, eye color, height, even weight sometimes. Other things that bother me is over-describing the scenery or
area where the story starts. Usually a manuscript can lose the first 3-5 chapters and start there. Besides the run-down
list preaching to me about a subject, I don't like having a character immediately tell me how much he/she hates the world
for whatever reason. In other words, tell me your issues on politics, the environment, etc. through your character.
That is a real turn off to me." - Miriam Hees (editor), Blooming Tree Press
"Perhaps
my biggest pet peeve with an opening chapter is when an author features too much exposition - when they go beyond what is
necessary for simply 'setting the scene.' I want to feel as if I'm in the hands of a master storyteller, and starting a story
with long, flowery, overly-descriptive sentences (kind of like this one) makes the writer seem amateurish and the story contrived.
Of course, an equally jarring beginning can be nearly as off-putting, and I hesitate to read on if I'm feeling disoriented
by the fifth page. I enjoy when writers can find a good balance between exposition and mystery. Too much accounting always
ruins the mystery of a novel, and the unknown is what propels us to read further. It is what keeps me up at night saying 'just
one more chapter, then I'll go to sleep.' If everything is explained away in the first chapter; I'm probably putting the book
down and going to sleep." - Peter Miller, Peter Miller Literary
"1. Squinting into the sunlight with a hangover in a crime novel. Good grief -- been done
a million times. 2. A sci-fi novel that spends the first two pages describing the strange landscape. 3. A trite statement
("Get with the program" or "Houston, we have a problem" or "You go girl" or "Earth to Michael" or "Are we all on the same
page?"), said by a weenie sales guy, usually in the opening paragraph. 4. A rape scene in a Christian novel, especially in
the first chapter. 5. 'Years later, Monica would look back and laugh...' 6. "The [adjective] [adjective] sun rose in the [adjective]
[adjective] sky, shedding its [adjective] light across the [adjective] [adjective] [adjective] land."
- Chip MacGregor, MacGregor Literary
"Here are things
I can't stand: Cliché openings in Fantasy can include an opening scene set in a battle (and my peeve is that I don't know
any of the characters yet so why should I care about this battle) or with a pastoral scene where the protagonist is gathering
herbs (I didn't realize how common this is). Opening chapters where a main protagonist is in the middle of a bodily
function (jerking off, vomiting, peeing, or what have you) is usually a firm NO right from the get-go. Gross. Long prologues
that often don't have anything to do with the story. So common in Fantasy again. Opening scenes that our all dialogue
without any context. I could probably go on..." - Kristin Nelson, Nelson Literary
Agency
"I recently read a ms when the second line
was something like, 'Let me tell you this, Dear Reader...' What do you think of that?"
- Sheree Bykofsky, Sheree Bykofsky Literary
"I know this may sound obvious, but too much 'telling' vs. 'showing'
in the first chapter is a definite warning sign for me – the first chapter should present a compelling scene, not a
road map for the rest of the book. The goal is to make the reader curious about your characters, fill their heads with questions
that must be answered, not fill them in on exactly where, when, who and how. Don’t ever describe eye color either..."
- Emily Sylvan Kim, Prospect Agency
"Characters that are moving around doing little things,
but essentially nothing. Washing dishes & thinking, staring out the window & thinking, tying shoes, thinking ... Authors
often do this to transmit information, but the result is action in a literal sense but no real energy in a narrative sense.
The best rule of thumb is always to start the story where the story starts." -
Dan Lazar, Writers House
"I hate reading purple prose, taking the time to set up-- to describe something so beautifully
and that has nothing to do with the actual story. I also hate when an author starts something and then says '(the main character)
would find out later.' I hate gratuitous sex and violence anywhere in the manuscript. If it is not crucial to the story
then I don't want to see it in there, in any chapters." - Cherry Weiner, Cherry
Weiner Literary
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