Everyone has certain touchstones for their personal Christmas celebrations. A biggie for me is Christmas tree ornaments.
Some of the ones on my tree pre-date my entrance into my family, and I look forward to hanging them on the tree every year,
and enjoying their presence in the house every December.
As a writer, however, I have to admit some of my most important Christmas traditions revolve around fiction, so here
are a few of my recommendations for holiday reading and viewing.
My favorite gay fiction Christmas story is If You Believe by William J. Mann. I came across this several
years in a collection of gay Christmas stories entitled All I Want for Christmas. Bill Mann's story is the
highlight of the collection, and the kind of story I vowed I would write someday. I've thanked you in person for this
story, Bill, but let me thank you again for one of the most beautiful gay love stories ever.
A lot of my Christmas favorites entered my life during my childhood, and since I firmly believe Christmas is for the
kid in all of us, I still read and enjoy many of them every December. I especially love the short stories Christmas
Every Day by W.D. Howells; The Fir Tree by Hans Christian Andersen, and How Santa Claus Found the
Poorhouse by Sophie Swett. Two of my favorite YA books from my early years took place during the holiday season:
That Archer Girl by Anne Emery (first published in 1959), and Take Me to My Friend by Hope Dahle
Jordan (first published in 1962). These are both hard to find, but fun reads. Christmas is incidental
to the stories, but they both remind me that life doesn't stop at the end of December the way our consumer-crazed society
seems to think it should.
Any Peanuts strip from Decembers gone by is worth savoring again at holiday time, thanks to the genius
of Charles Schulz.
Although there has been a positive flood of Christmas novels in the past few years, I haven't had much time to read very
many of them. However, as a Flannie Flagg fan, I recommend A Redbird Christmas.
For Christmas non-fiction, I recommend Merry Christmas! by Karal Ann Marling, which is a delightful exploration
into the history of many of our modern-day Christmas traditions.
And as for television and movies...ah...where to start? As a hardcore member of the second television generation,
I am as hooked on those holiday specials as I was forty years ago. Therefore, it isn't Christmas for me until I hear
the following:
"MERRY CHRISTMAS, CHARLIE BROWN!" (The Peanuts gang in A Charlie Brown Christmas)
"Happy birthday!" (Jackie Vernon as Frosty in Frosty The Snowman)
"I'd like to be a dentist." (Herbie in Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer -- Is there a gay kid
out there who can't relate to that misfit elf?)
"Aw, you're all a bunch of pissants." (Judy Norton Taylor as Mary Ellen Walton in The Homecoming)
"Now, I want that tree out of my house!" (Jason Robards as James Mills in A House Without a Christmas Tree)
"Why Mary, you're worth more dead than alive." (Orson Welles as Mr. Potter in It Happened One Christmas)
"I must find a way to stop Christmas from coming." (Boris Karloff as The Grinch in How the Grinch Stole Christmas)
From the movies:
"I hope I die young. And very wealthy!" (Haley Mills as Mary Clancy in The Trouble With Angels -
1966)
"Santa Claus has been here!" (Eric Shea as Phillip North in Yours, Mine & Ours - 1968)
Although I usually watch this one at Thanksgiving, I have to include Home For the Holidays (1995) as well,
but I'm not about to write all of my favorite quotes from that one. Just go watch it if you never have.
And of course, as every reader of The Handyman's Dream has probably guessed, my all-time favorite Christmas
TV episode is from the first season of Mary Tyler Moore -- Christmas and the Hard Luck Kid Part Two. This
long-time radio disc jockey knows exactly how it feels to be at work alone on Christmas. (By the way, if you're
curious about Christmas and the Hard Luck Kid Part One, check out the first season of That Girl, also available
on DVD, and another classic Christmas episode.)
So you may be wondering: Since I'm such a fan of Christmas fiction, have I ever attempted a holiday story of my
own? Okay, so maybe you're not wondering, but it just so happens I have. It's been read and enjoyed by people
close to me, and hopefully it'll find a wider audience someday.
Happy Holidays!
As a former radio station music director I hope it's understandable that I sometimes find Christmas music a little tedious.
I tell you, there's nothing like scheduling an All Christmas Weekend to bring out the Scrooge in a guy. Oh, the joy
of juggling ten different versions of "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas," "White Christmas," and "Sleigh Ride."
It makes me positively giddy just thinking about it.
And then there is the new stuff. Every October the new Christmas CD's would start to pour into my mailbox at the
radio station. Since only the very rare good songs and the mostly mediocre make it to the airwaves you can't imagine
the disasters that are recorded every year in the hopes of making a quick buck on the holiday season, or as a way to promote
unknown artists. Wanna experience Christmas hell? Ask a music director if you can go through their Christmas CD
Discards box sometime. Trust me, it will turn you into a grinch so fast the Whos down in Whoville won't know what hit
'em.
The irony of this, of course, is that I am truly a sentimental Christmas slob. I put my tree up every year, still
cry over Charlie Brown and Frosty on television, and I really do love Christmas music...in limited quanities. Since
several people have sniffed that I seem to be lacking in the holiday spirit where Christmas tunes are concerned, I decided
to describe Nick's Ultimate Christmas Mix CD.
The usual suspects are on it, but they must be by the original artists. Therefore, "White Christmas" must be
Bing Crosby; "The Christmas Song" has to be Nat "King" Cole (although Christina Aguilera's disco version is kinda fun); "Rockin'
Around the Christmas Tree" must be Brenda Lee, and the only "Jingle Bell Rock" I'm interested in is Bobby Helms'
version. Most cover versions of these songs -- especially those recorded in the past ten years or so -- are as abominable
as the monster in Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, and about as toothless.
I remember a Christmas episode of Designing Women where Charlene was talking about a Christmas TV commercial
that had her "down on the carpet sobbing my guts out." There are several Christmas songs that do that to me: "Merry
Christmas Darling" (The Carpenters); "Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)" (Darlene Love); "Christmas Time Is Here" (The Vince
Guaraldi Trio); "It's the Most Wonderful Time Of the Year" (Andy Williams), and "Same Old Lang Syne" from Dan Fogelberg.
My favorite Christmas album is an LP my mom bought for me in 1966 or 1967. It's one of those wonderful children's
albums they used to make with mostly anonymous studio musicians and singers. My favorite versions of "Up On the
House Top," "Frosty the Snowman," "Sing a Kris Kringle Jingle," "Nuttin' for Christmas" and "Jolly Old St. Nicholas"
are all found on this record, and I have to listen to it every year when I'm decorating the Christmas tree.
My favorite version of "Sleigh Ride" is Leroy Anderson's instrumental, and although Judy Garland's original "Have
Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" is impossible to top, there is a different version on my mix CD. Back in
2000 a two man group out of Chicago who called themselves Soleil Moon recorded a CD single of their take on "Have
Yourself a Merry Little Christmas." I'm guessing it's next to impossible to find, so I'm glad I have a copy. It's haunting
and sincere, unlike the sugary, sappy versions more well-known artists crank out.
And good luck finding "Snoopy's Christmas" by The Royal Guardsmen. This is an ESSENTIAL holiday tune at Nick's
house, and the original 1967 45 rpm record I scavenged from the storeroom of a defunct radio station is definitely one
of my prized possessions. Another one of my rare favorites is "A Not So Very Merry Christmas" by Bobby Vee.
If anyone out there has heard and liked this one, or has a copy, let me know. We should be friends.
As for "Santa Claus Is Coming To Town," well, only The Boss can do that one. The one time I saw Springsteen
in concert was December 1992 at the old Market Square Arena in Indianapolis. At one point he put on his santa hat
and performed that song, and there was Nick up in the cheap seats, singing along with very wet eyes.
So you see, when radio, television, and stores cram holiday music down our throats every year, I get disgusted because
Christmas is about memories and personal experience, and drowning in it doesn't increase the joy, it only diminishes it.
So have your own merry little Christmas, and don't let anyone call you a Scrooge because you prefer your holiday celebrations
in limited doses.
