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ALL-TIME FRANCHISE PLAYERS (8/07)

Who’s your best player in franchise history? I asked each tem to help with this one and received responses from all but Jeff.

North Dakota

Randy Johnson. An integral part of the team’s championship glory years (including one championship year when, due to injury, he was actually a 66-inning reliever). Has made the team virtually every year since 1993.

Constantinople

Alex Rodriguez*. Since 1996, he is either #1 or #2 in all cumulative statistics of note including 168 homeruns, which is almost twice that of the second place Manatee who had 97 homers. The consummate team player, he has been willing to change positions, be a defensive replacement and accept a part time role for an isolated year if that means the team having its best shot at winning a championship. The face of the franchise.

The Human Stains, et al

Well, if I'd kept hold of Clemens I would say he's the all-time franchise player. But since I traded him and still won several titles A.C. (after Clemens), I suppose I should select someone else. That said, since I also don't keep stats anymore, unless I'm competing, it's a hard call. Minus statistical reflection, I may have to elect Rafael Palmeiro as the all-time franchise player, since I had him virtually his whole career (thanks to one of the worst trades I'll wager RAT ever made).

But where would I have been without, say, Lenny Dyskstra, Von Hayes, Dale Murphy, Harold Baines, Orel Hershiser, Dennis Eckersley, even Dave Winfield for a few years? Or Mike Stanley? and what about----Steve Sax? And Mark Clear? (just kidding.) and Rick Sutcliffe? ah, the good old days....so I guess Palmeiro gets the nod, steroids and all.

Manila Folders

Mark McGwire, perhaps the best SOMBILLA season ever, winning the triple crown for the first, and only, time.

A close second would be Gary Redus, for defining the drafting philosophy of the team so well.

Jed

Which franchise? I think players I traded had more impact on the league so I'll go with Mike Piazza.

New Orleans

Mariano Rivera. 10th round pick in '96 draft. 'Nuff said.

Bay City

Pudge Rodriguez. Pretty sure he’s made my team every year since I drafted him, and he probably saved me dozens (hundreds?) of runs with his throwing arm (or, more accurately, the threat of his throwing arm). Honorable mention to 1^st BC pick ever, Cal Ripken, Jr.

Future Wax

The most important player in FW franchise history is Barry Bonds, or __________ on his card. Bonds is a four-time league MVP (92-93, 94-95, 01-02, 02-03), holds the league records for homeruns (32), runs (74), OPS (1.465), and SLUG (.994). Since 1997, he has hit 42 post-season home-runs (stats for 01-02 are missing) over 90 play-off games.

* asshole

SUCCESSFUL LEFTY STARTERS (8/07)

Harold, on the heels of lefty Dontrelle Willis winning the Cy Young award asked how many lefties have ever won the Cy Young award? What championship teams have had lefties in the rotation?

The first question is easy – only 2 lefty pitchers have ever won the SOMBILLA’s Cy Young award. The first was Fernando Valenzuela for Yitz’s Learned Hands, back in ‘86-87. He finished with an 8-5 record and a 3.05 ERA for the 7^th place Hands. And Dontrelle Willis, last year, was the second.

As far as lefties on championship teams goes, see below:

* not sure if he spot started.

13 of the 27 champions had no lefty starters. A compelling stat. And looking at the three champions with two lefty starters, Underwood (he of lefty-yanking rule fame), Nabholz, and Rosado were all spot starters, not regulars in the rotation. Meaning that half of all champions had no lefties in the rotation and the other half had one regular.

The Cute Ratings [8/06]

Which league’s franchise doesn’t give a shit about societal mores? Who flaunts boorish, illegal behavior in the rest of the league’s face? Which team is the most gentlemanly, intolerant of criminal activity on its roster? This summer, the SOMBILLA spotlight team studies the bad boys of the SOMBILLA - detailing a team by team summary of arrest records.

Not surprisingly, Future Wax heads the shame roll. Tsuan and Andrew (and more recently Randy) clearly have an eye for stockpiling thugs, hoodlums and criminals. The question is, do their wives know about this predilection?

At the other extreme, Constantinople has a very scant bad boy record.   Tom & Land win the goody two shoes award.

Future Wax

• Barry Bonds - domestic violence & tax evasion, among other things.

• Ramon Castro - accused of raping a woman in his hotel room (drafted by North Dakota this year after being acquitted of rape).
• Bobby Chouinard - pleaded guilty to aggravated assault for abusing his wife, served a year in jail. Chouinard, then with the Arizona Diamondbacks, was arrested after he hit his wife, Erica, and held a loaded gun to her head while she begged for her life, police said.

• Wil Cordero - hit his wife with a phone in a celebrated case while a member of the Red Sox.

• Eric Davis - Drove the "getaway car" when Vince Coleman chucked that M-80 into the Dodger Stadium parking lot out his window. See Coleman below...
• Dwight Gooden - Missed the first two months of the 1987 season when he checked himself into a drug rehab center. Suspended for 60 days in 1994 for testing positive for cocaine. Suspended for the entire 1995 season after testing positive for coke again, while on suspension from the first charge. Arrested in Feb 2002 for drunk driving. Not only drunk but was on a suspended license and had open booze the car. Arrested again in January 2003 for driving with a suspended license. At least he wasn't drunk. Arrested in March 2005 for punching his ex-wife in the face. No word if he was drunk
• Darryl Strawberry

• April 7, 1989 -- Named in a lawsuit in Clayton, Mo., charging that he fathered a son with Lisa Clayton.
• Jan. 26, 1990 -- Arrested for alleged assault with a deadly weapon during an argument with his wife. He is alleged to have hit her in the face with an open hand and also to have threatened her with a .25-caliber semiautomatic handgun.
• Sept. 4, 1993 -- Arrested for allegedly striking Charisse Simons, the 26-year-old woman he lived with.
• March 3, 1994 -- Investigated by the IRS and U.S. Attorney's Office for allegedly failing to file tax returns for in excess of $300,000 of income derived from autograph and memorabilia shows.
• April 4, 1994 -- Dodgers announce Strawberry has a substance abuse problem and place him on the disabled list.
• Dec. 8, 1994 -- He and his agent Eric Goldschmidt were indicted on federal tax evasion charges alleging that Strawberry failed to report more than $500,000 in income earned from 1986 through 1990.
• Feb. 6, 1995 -- Major league baseball suspends Strawberry for 60 days after he tested positive for cocaine. The Giants, citing a clause in his contract, terminate the deal and release him.
• Dec. 11, 1995 -- Strawberry is charged in California with failing to make child support payments and faces one count of willful failure to provide child support, two counts of violating a court order to provide child support and another order to provide spousal support.
• Aug. 20, 1998 -- Sued by attorney Robert Shapiro for $100,000 plus interest in fees for a contract settlement Shapiro negotiated with the Dodgers in 1994.
• April 14, 1999 -- Charged with possession of cocaine and soliciting a prostitute. According to police, Strawberry allegedly solicited an undercover officer for sex for $50. Upon being searched, 0.3 grams of powder cocaine was found inside of his wallet. He was released on $6,000 bond.
• Feb. 22, 2000 -- A Florida Department of Corrections report says Strawberry tested positive for cocaine on Jan. 19.
• March 2002 -- Kicked out of drug treatment center for trading some of his memorabilia for cigarettes and having sex with a female resident. Of course Darryl was married at the time...

• Kenny Rogers - beat up a photographer

Area 51/Hatchbacks/Sardukar

• Jose Canseco - Arrested in March of 1984, but nobody knows why. Charged with aggravated assault in 1992 for purposely ramming into his first wife's car. Arrested in 1997 for beating his second wife. Admitted to taking steroids during his career and estimated that 50% of all ballplayers use roids. Arrested with bro Ozzie in 11/2001 for getting into a fight with some dudes at a nightclub. Guess which side needed 20 stitches and had a broken nose? Jose claimed he was a "victim". Promptly blew off the court date for above charges. Got two years of house arrest for blowing off above charges in April 2003.
• Darren Daulton - Arrested for DUI in Pinellas County, Florida in 1988. His license was also suspended in the late '90s due to unpaid speeding tickets; he received at least five during that time period, including one for traveling over 100 miles-per-hour in a 65 zone. While under this suspension, he was involved in an accident causing $20,000 damage to his BMW. He was charged with DUI, driving with a suspended license, and failing to appear in court. Daulton claimed the accident was a result of getting run off the road in lieu of a business deal with ties to the FBI and the White House. Exactly two years later, he was arrested again for driving with a suspended license and DUI, after again refusing to be tested for alcohol. Daulton was also arrested on domestic violence charges, accused of abusing his second wife Nicole, who subsequently filed for divorce. In 2004, he spent two months in jail in contempt of court after refusing to abide by the terms of a legal agreement related to the divorce.
• Steve Garvey --beating Cindy up
• Brett Myers - beat up his wife on Boylston Street in front of shocked pedestrians.
• Denny Neagle - soliciting a prostitute.

• John Rocker – Never arrested, but we have to mention him. Speaking of NY, he told SI "Imagine having to take the train to the ballpark, looking like you're riding through Beirut next to some kid with purple hair, next to some queer with AIDS, right next to some dude who just got out of jail for the fourth time, right next to some 20-year-old mom with four kids. It's depressing." During a subsequent interview, he spat on a Georgia 400 toll machine and mocked Asian women. Additionally, he referred to then-teammate Randall Simon as being a "fat monkey."

• Mike Stanton - beat up a groundskeeper in Red Sox bullpen

• Willie Wilson plead guilty to attempting to buy cocaine and was sentenced to 3 months prison.

(Jed assumes liability for both franchise’s bad boys)

• Wally Backman - arrested for drunk driving. Indicted for assault on his wife and her friend
• Derek Bell - possession
• Albert Belle - tracked his ex-girlfriend with a GPS device and repeatedly threatened her
• Milton Bradley - disorderly conduct
• Ken Caminiti - drugs
• Vince Coleman - Threw a lighted firecracker into a crowd of people in the Dodger Stadium parking lot. A young girl was hurt and Vince had to serve 200 hours of community service.
• Chili Davis - Charged with disorderly conduct following California's win over the Brewers in Milwaukee in 1995. Davis allegedly slapped a fan who was taunting him. Chili also had a hit in the game.

• Rafael Furcal - DUI
• Todd Hollandsworth - DUI
• Julio Lugo - domestic violence
• Jeff Nelson - beat up a groundskeeper in Red Sox bullpen

• Kirby Puckett - arrested for accosting and assaulting a woman in the restroom of a downtown Minneapolis restaurant.

• Harold Reynolds - fired from ESPN allegedly because of sexual misconduct
• Dmitri Young - domestic violence

New Orleans

• Scott Erickson - domestic violence

• Steve Howe - cocaine. About 26 times.
• Kevin Mitchell - Sued by a former girlfriend in 1989, who claimed that Mitchell beat her and threatened her with a gun. Charges were dropped after Mitchell agreed to enter a domestic violence program. Was arrested for felony battery after hitting his own father during a dispute. It gets better. The dispute took place because Mitchell was trying to evict his own father from a house he was renting him. Apparently daddy was a bit behind on the payments.
• Manny Ramirez - drunk driving
• Jeff Reardon - robbed a jewelry store in his hometown

• Ruben Rivera--stealing various articles out of the Yankee clubhouse with intent to sell

• Dave Stewart - after police observed him soliciting a prostitute in downtown L.A., Stewart was arrested a few minutes later in a nearby alley. Also arrested was the hooker, "Lucille." It just so happened, however, that Lucille was actually Elson Tyler, a 27-year-old 6-foot-3 unemployed laborer. ''Mr. Stewart said he was unaware that Tyler was a male until after the arrest,'' Police Comdr. William Booth said. ''That was his statement and we have reason to believe him.'' Vice officers refused to give details of the incident but a police source said the transvestite was performing oral on Stewart.

North Dakota

• Roberto Alomar – spat on an umpire
• Pedro Guerrero - Suspended from the Mexican League in 1999 - details are sketchy. Was parading around with OJ Simpson's post-Nicole girlfriend Christine Prodey, apparently on coke binges and having sex. OJ didn't take too kindly to this and called 911 on them. Cops showed up and Prodey was arrested. Arrested in September of 1999 for trying to buy 33 pounds of cocaine from an undercover agent. Was acquitted of drug conspiracy charges in June of 2002 after his attorney argued his low IQ prevented him from understanding that he agreed to a drug deal.
• Esteban Loaiza – DUI

• Al Martin –Charged with exchanging punches with a woman who claims she married him in a 1998 Las Vegas wedding. The argument started when she accused Martin of still being married to someone else and he was accused of bigamy.

• Luis Polonia was arrested for having sex with a minor.
• Sidney Ponson - beating up a judge; DUI
• Tim Raines - Admitted to being a cocaine user and used to get high during games. Raines told reporters that he would keep a vial of coke in his pocket and would slide headfirst while stealing to make sure the vial wouldn't break.
• Tim Teufel - Arrested with fellow Mets Bob Ojeda, Rick Aguilera and Ron Darling after a brawl at a Houston bar. The four apparently were out celebrating the birth of Tim's child when they felt compelled to start a fight with some off-duty police officers working as security guards.

Swarzluna

• Roger Clemens - Was arrested with brother Gary in 1991 for assaulting a police officer following a disturbance at a Houston nightclub.
• Tim Crews, who died with Steve Olin in the motorboat incident, was piloting drunk.
• Lenny Dykstra - After downing a few cold ones at John Kruk's bachelor party, Dykstra drove his car into a tree and really fucked up his passenger, Darren Daulton. Dykstra came out relatively unhurt, although he added a DWI to his record. Was rumored to have built-up a $100,000 gambling debt. Was charged on accusations of sexual battery with a 17-year-old girl. Apparently he touched her inappropriately, though she was clothed. On the plus side, he does play Strat-O.
• Keith Hernandez - Admitted that he went crazy on coke during the 1980 season, despite batting .321. Also admitted that he used to play high and would wake up shaking. Suspended for one year in 1986 for... guess what? Drugs.

• Ray Knight - Was charged with Hunting from public road, Hunting from a motor vehicle, Hunting without permission and Hunting deer at night on January 26, 2001. Apparently Ray and a buddy were returning from a hunting trip and he spotted a deer on the road. Knight claimed he merely wanted to look at the deer and his charges were reduced to Criminal Trespass and "Blinding wildlife with lights."

• Pete Rose - taxes, gambling on baseball

Bay City

• Oil Can Boyd - threatening a female business partner. unpaid speeding ticket. Also overdue x-rated videos, stalking

• Wes Gardner - some type of wife abuse
• Jose Mesa - fondling
• Sammy Sosa - hit wife with rum bottle
• Frank Thomas - domestic violence
• BJ Upton – DUI

• John Rocker – Never arrested, but we have to mention him. Speaking of NY, he told SI "Imagine having to take the train to the ballpark, looking like you're riding through Beirut next to some kid with purple hair, next to some queer with AIDS, right next to some dude who just got out of jail for the fourth time, right next to some 20-year-old mom with four kids. It's depressing." During a subsequent interview, he spat on a Georgia 400 toll machine and mocked Asian women. Additionally, he referred to then-teammate Randall Simon as being a "fat monkey."
• Otis Nixon - He struggled with a cocaine problem since the 1980's. He first tried it as a college freshman and got hooked. He was first arrested in 1987 while playing at the AAA level Buffalo Bisons for possession and spent 28 days in rehab. Near the end of the 1991 season, he tested positive for cocaine and was suspended by Major League Baseball. He missed the World Series because of it. He cleaned up after the suspension and did not have any brushes with the law until 2004, when he was charged with threatening his bodyguard with a knife and in a separate incident, misdemeanor sexual assault. Authorities could not understand why Nixon would have a bodyguard. The Gwinnett County GA charge has been concluded, however the DeKalb County Charge remains. He still is under Examination for Fraud and questionable Financial Transaction(s).
  

Not really a study, just a compilation. Somewhat related to Study 3. Including direct quotes from recent summer newsletters:

2006 – As usual we burned Barry Bonds.

2005 - Robin had previously proposed resurrecting an old Canseco card and ‘injecting’ it, although she was vague about how that would be accomplished. As a result, we kept it simple and burned Barry Bonds.

2004 - There was a lot of sentiment around burning ‘alleged’ steroid user Barry Bonds. There was also a lot of momentum for burning another Future Wax bad boy, rapist Ramon Castro. Some tried to argue creatively that, if it hadn’t been for the steroids, Bonds would be a rapist too. In the end, that speculation proved to be no match for actual facts, and Castro was burned.

2003 - The winning choice was to burn David Wells, who was then burned. If we’d had a copy of his book we’d have burned that too.

2002 - The winning choice was to burn Ruben Rivera. The card of Derek Jeter watched and cheered.

2001 - The only nomination received was for Bobby Chouinard, who was then burned.

2000 - Nominations were received for John Rocker, Al Martin, Daryl Strawberry, and Bobby Chouinard, the most number of nominations ever. The votes were Rocker 5, Martin 1 (Eric abstained). John Rocker was then burned.

1999 - Wil Cordero

1998 - Tony Phillips and Wil Cordero

Previous to 1998, Robin was in charge of card burning decisions. At the ’97 draft, Land proposed formalizing the card burning process by allowing for nominations and putting the card burning to a vote. His proposal passed 7-2.

1997 - Mike Greenwell

1996 - Darryl Strawberry

1995 - Jack Morris

1994 - Matt Young

1993 - Gary Carter

1992 - Gary Carter

1991 - Gary Carter

1990 - Bill Buckner

1989 - Glenn Hoffman

1988 - ???

1987 - Pete Rose

1986 - ???

1985 - Mike Torrez

1984 - Bucky Dent

Card burnings for 1988, 1986, and years prior have not been documented.

Last summer, we presented the top 71 all-time SOMBILLA home run leaders (all those with more than 50).

Here is an updated list of the top 20:

As promised last summer, here is the following list of SOMBILLA wins leaders, dating back from ‘83-84, the first year we kept stats for all the teams, through last year. A couple of years in there, (for example, last year) not all the teams did their stats, but this is the best we can do.

Hopefully, I got everyone. If you think of someone who should be on the list, let me know -and I’ll look into it. This list includes all those with 30 or more recorded wins:

Constantinople, thanks to the astute managing and GMing of Tom (and to a lesser extent, Land) won its first SOMBILLA championship 4 months ago – 13 years after being awarded an expansion franchise (Note: this 13 years is shorter than the 19 years it took the Yitz/Durga/Harold franchise to win its first championship, while Manila is on 20 and counting).

In the spring of 1992, the SOMBILLA voted 6-2 to award Land his own expansion team and become the 9^th team in the league. (Arnie and Robin, who were and are good friends with Land, cast the only opposing votes. Arnie because he didn’t want to do the extra scheduling and stats, and Robin, on principle. Land did not hold it against us, inviting us to his wedding a few years later.)

A few weeks before the April draft, the other 7 teams were allowed to protect 30 players (then as now, rosters were 45 players). Since we (the established teams) were going to cut 10 of these people anyway, we basically screwed Land by giving him crap (or perhaps a slight upgrade from crap) expansion players to choose from. He was limited to 2 players per team. I recall that after he got the list he called me to ask if he was forced to actually take two players from every team. I said no.

He got 10 draft picks – last pick in every round, then we gave him the stack of leftovers, from which he chose 20 or so players to fill out his roster. We magnanimously gave him two weeks to do that.

1. Were any of the expansion pickups any good? Or even helpful? Well, in the ’92 Summer Newsletter, I posted the following analysis:

Land immediately traded Stanton and A. Rhodes to Jed for Zeile. He also traded Thompson to Eric for a 7 ^th rounder in the following year’s draft. When Land made the playoffs 4 years later, Zeile, Hansen, O. Nixon and Taubensee all took part in the celebration. Nixon still holds the league’s all-time single season steal record (53 in ‘92-93)

Check out that last guy! Literally, the 45^th man on his roster, not even drafted, the last guy in the league and he’s having an all-star year in ’05. He was an ill-advised cut of Tom’s in 2002, the last remaining player on the original Constantinople.

Land hasn’t participated in a few years now. How many were Land guys and how many Tom’s? Researching the 25 players on Tom’s championship roster, here are a few facts:

• 24 of the 25 players were drafted by Constantinople (including 2 who were drafted twice by CN). Only one player was acquired in a trade. (Aquilino Lopez from Robin during the ‘04-05 campaign).

• 10 of the 25 players (40%) were from Tom’s 2004 draft. We’ve never studied that particular statistic, but I’m guessing it’s a pretty high percentage historically, for a championship team or otherwise.

• 22 of the 25 players were acquired after Tom became involved in the team. The other 3 were pretty important, though:

• Alex Rodriguez was drafted 1^st overall by Land in the 1995 draft.
• Jason Giambi was a 12^th round pick by Land in ’96!*
• Uegeth Urbina was a 9^th round pick by Brian and Land in the ’97 draft.

1999: Tom’s first draft – he and Land worked together. Abreau – 2^nd round, Varitek – 6 ^th , C. Everett- 8^th

2000: Land and Tom still working together. Hudson – 1^st, K. Wells – 4^th, Dotel – 7 ^th

2001: Land still active in Gming. It’s hard from the outside to know who was responsible for drafting whom. But at least until ’02, Land had a strong interest in participating as a GM. Herges – 7^th round (cut in ’03 and redrafted in ’04).

2002: The "contraction draft". Perhaps the low point of the Land/Tom marriage as there was some brief discussion of Tom getting Clint’s old team and finding a new manager for Land. In the end, they reached an amiable understanding. A. Jones – 1^st , Nevin – 2^nd (both former BiG DiG players), Mora – 13 ^th round (cut in ’03 and redrafted in ’04).

2003: Tom may have been flying solo for this one. Borowski – 8^th, C. Lee – 9^th, J. Schmidt – 10 ^th

2004: Land definitely AWOL. Ensberg – 1 ^st, Mora – 2^nd, J. Guillen – 3^rd , Redman – 4^th, Herges – 4^th, Bay – 7^th , Stairs – 9^th, Wunsch – 10^th, Durham – 11^th , Capuano – 12^th

In the NFL, the last player drafted is nicknamed "Mr. Irrelevant" and is feted to a week long party in California. Former Pats LB Marty Moore was drafted last and had a productive career for New England. So these guys can be good pickups, but there has to be some good scouting and some luck. We’ve even instituted our own tradition, shouting "Spooneybarger" to officially end the draft. Who are these guys? And who is the best Mr. Irrelevant?

There is actually one Hall of Famer on this list. The problem is, when Joel drafted Don Sutton with the last pick of the 1987 draft, the guy was 42, and Joel was about to end his affiliation with the SOMBILLA. To me, that’s the worst Mr. Irrelevant pick. At least everyone else was trying. A pretty negligible list, with a couple of notable exceptions (as I write this, Ortiz just singled in A-Rod in the All-Star game). Giambi is the best Mr. Irrelevant, but after performance enhancing drugs are factored in, you have to go with Ortiz. Chuck Nagy is an honorable mention.

Some of these guys did play in the league, although for most of those, their best Strat-O years were with other managers before they were redrafted as Mr. Irrelevant. For the record, this study was not my idea.

All-time SOMBILLA Home Run Leaders (7/04)

It’s been a long-time coming, but I finally did some serious data entry and have come up with the following list of SOMBILLA home run leaders, dating back from ‘83-84, the first year we kept stats for all the teams, through last year. A couple of years in there, not all the teams did their stats, but this is the best we can do.

Hopefully, I got everyone. If you think of someone who should be on the list, let me know -and I’ll look into it. Next year, we’ll do the wins leaders:

Here are the top 25:

Rank        Name                      HR