A Question of Water, Act 1

CHARACTERS

Harris, late 20’s.

Mel, 30’s.

The Fisherman, 60’s.

Tobias, 50’s.

Anna, his daughter, mid-late 20’s.

Dottie, her sister, 17.

Lincoln, 30’s.

Randall, his brother, early 20’s.

Big George, 30-40.

TIME

One recent summer.

SETTING:

DownStageRight: The reservoir shore. Simple. Empty. Spectral. Otherworldly.

CenterStage Extended: TOBIAS’ house. Spare, non-naturalistic, no walls between rooms. The only two permanent elements are the fish’s bathtub and the carved wood table to be used for the ritual meal. Other elements as needed: Chairs, curtained window, ANNA’s bed, the makeshift fetish of an altar etc.***

DownStageLeft: Drilling company job site trailer. A work table, chair, telephone, blueprints on walls. Sign on top of trailer reads:

CONTINENTAL PIPE DRILLING SERVICE

Job Site Office

We will restore pressure and flow

to your municipal water system

Service Available Nationwide

Call 1-800-Clogged

ACT I

Scene 1

(MEL and HARRIS, both wearing hip-wader boots, dig a hole with shovels in street DownStageCenter. They dig slowly in the hot sun.)

HARRIS

I hate this. I hate this hole.

MEL

Hole’s a hole.

(They dig.)

HARRIS

I’d rather be diggin’ any hole but this one.

MEL

Diggin’s diggin’.

(They dig.)

HARRIS

Remember that hole?…I forget the state…soon as we scooped a shovel’a mud out it’d fill right up again? No way two men with shovels could dig a hole in that swamp. Might as well try to dig a hole in water. Senseless diggin’. Senseless work. I hate senseless work.

MEL

It’s all senseless work, Harris. We’re doin’ it for the money.

HARRIS

God didn’t create man in his image to labor on senseless holes. Adam was formed outta dirt.

MEL

Don’t start.

HARRIS

Lost a boot in that swamp. Sucked off my foot into the bowels of the Earth. Spooky.

MEL

You know your problem, Harris? You don’t act like a man on the clock. To a man on the clock, a hole’s a hole and that’s that.

(They dig.)

HARRIS

You know your problem, Mel? You don’t see nothin’ bigger’n you. You’re like the little dog who ain’t seen the big dog yet.

(They dig.)

HARRIS (cont’d.)

This is, without doubt, the most hateful hole I ever dug. If it was my own grave, I’d not find it more hateful.

MEL

Okay, I’ll bite. Why?

HARRIS

Rocks. Bone-breakin’ rocks. Cars parked close. Feelin’ closed in. Breakfast not agreein’ with me. Breakfast not agreein’ with you. That big German Shepherd with the skinny tie rope two houses down. Nine weeks out, nine more ‘til I go home. Time at a crawl. Missin’ Linda bad. Dread’a strikin’ utility wires. Dread.

MEL

That it?

HARRIS

Big George hoggin’ the Cat which could dig this hole in a New York minute and Lincoln stickin’ us here when we could be hangin’ out with everybody. Now why’d Lincoln do that? You think he still likes us?

MEL

You know your problem, Harris? You need people to like you. Needin’ people to like ‘im is a pathetic trait in a man.

HARRIS

And what’s wrong with it?

MEL

Makes ‘im a weak link on the road: Worried ‘bout his place in the crew, missin’ his wife, distracted near heavy machinery. You’re gonna get someone hurt.

(They dig.)

HARRIS

There’s another reason I ‘specially hate this hole. Wanna hear it?

MEL

Like I gotta choice in here.

HARRIS

Don’t do it now but in a little bit and real slow turn your head and take a look at that house. See the man in the front window?

(Lights up on TOBIAS standing UpStageCenter, very still.)

MEL

Yeah?

HARRIS

Watchin’? Just watchin’?

MEL

Yeah?

HARRIS

He’s been doin’ it since we got here. And yesterday...

MEL

Just another shut-in lookin’ out.

HARRIS

Spooky. Rockin’ back and forth. And yesterday as that man walked by, I said ‘Hey’ but he looked right through me like I was made of glass. Everythin’ must be a window to a window-watcher like him. Gave me a bone chill to be looked at like that. Plucked a hair out my arm and ate it to keep the dark spirit off.

MEL

Know what, Harris? You oughtta call your wife without delay before you hurt somebody.

HARRIS

Somethin’ about that house. Spooky. Let’s go find the guys.

MEL

Right. Let’s. This hole’s dug.

(HARRIS and MEL walk left with shovels on their shoulders. They cross paths with THE FISHERMAN, also in hip-waders, entering from left with fishing rod on his shoulder. When HARRIS sees THE FISHERMAN, he slows down and stares at him going by so that MEL continues walking on, leaving HARRIS standing there alone. Blackout. End of Scene.)

Scene 2

(TOBIAS is standing still DownStageCenter, while THE FISHERMAN fishes at reservoir shore, a metal tub nearby.)

THE FISHERMAN

(To Audience.)

A Question of Water: A fable about a man and a fish. First question: How far in does a man have to go before he starts to come out the other side?

He wakes in the dark, as usual, out of an unremembered dream, and feels his wife beside him again. Feels her arm along his arm, the warmth and weight of her sleep, hears her breathing. These things are written in the body. A humming of the air...done. He opens his eyes, looks over...the world becomes as nothing. He dresses as a man in a dream dresses discovering his body. Down the hall he walks past Dorothy’s room and then Anna’s room but Anna’s bed is empty, unslept in this morning, disturbing...Then it’s out the front door and up to the reservoir. It’s 3 AM...Air warm...Trees thick with summer leaves...No wind. Tobias is walking around the water, trying to rebuild himself in the world...

(TOBIAS walks slowly at first.)

TOBIAS

These are my legs, my arms. This is the woods, the air. I breathe the air. There’s the moon. Beyond the trees is the water. Nice water. Out there in the dark. Still water. Quiet in the dark. On my side. On my side.

(Suddenly panicking, TOBIAS crashes into and through the underbrush. Finally, he reaches the reservoir shore, trips over the tub and tumbles down. THE FISHERMAN helps the dazed TOBIAS sit up.)

THE FISHERMAN

You okay, Buddy? Hey, you’re cut up. Bleeding. Gave your leg a good smack. Anybody you want to call? Mister? I got a cellular in my pocket. You better call somebody. No? Right. Big deal this thing. Big walky-talky deal. Truth is I’m a sick guy not permitted to be out of reach anymore. The real truth is I got a phone ringing in my pocket and a dead man’s heart beating in my chest. Transplant.

(THE FISHERMAN gets first-aid kit and treats TOBIAS’s scratches and wounds.)

THE FISHERMAN (cont’d.)

Alcohol? Nah. Do I look like an alcohol-in-an-open-cut guy? It’s hydrogen peroxide rest assured. Here turn this way if you don’t mind. That’s it. These aren’t bad. Like nicks from shaving. This one on your leg though I’d get it checked out. This is a good spot, private. You’re the first other person who’s managed to reach it. Before you I never saw one footprint, beer can or used rubber on this bank.

TOBIAS

He’s talking to me about used rubbers?

THE FISHERMAN

Don’t get me wrong. I’m a happily married man. Oh I look. Who doesn’t look?

TOBIAS

He’s talking to me about looking?

THE FISHERMAN

My wife is still beautiful to me. She is every woman to me. We met at a funeral you know. Twice, death has saved my life.

TOBIAS

Why is he telling me these things? You, please, I come here to be alone.

(A pause. THE FISHERMAN resumes fishing.)

THE FISHERMAN

A bear is what I thought, big guy like you, a bear crashing through the woods. No dog, no raccoon, no stoned out teenager could make such a tumult. Then I asked myself, what would a bear be doing in New Jersey?

TOBIAS

Trying to get out like everybody else.

THE FISHERMAN

Ha! Ha! Good one. Trying to get out. Ha! I’m glad you’re funny. Because the doctor you know what he told me to do after my operation? Laugh, be sure to laugh a good twenty minutes a day. Ha!

TOBIAS

(Darkly. Mocking.)

Ha, ha.

THE FISHERMAN

Right, that was my reaction. Ha, ha. But the doctor said: Laugh at nothing. Laugh to massage your insides. Laugh at the rocks.

TOBIAS

Ha, ha, ha.

THE FISHERMAN

Right. NO! No. I said goodbye to myself, goodbye to life before going under. I was hooked to machines, my heart cut out, dead. But my new heart was young and strong and dragged me back. For the first month of recovery, I did nothing but weep. Weeping was my argument with life not to have to live anymore. So what’s wrong with you? Come on. Don’t be a stranger?

TOBIAS

We are strangers.

THE FISHERMAN

No, we belong to each other.

TOBIAS

You, you’re the funny one.

THE FISHERMAN

I come from death.

TOBIAS

You’re own death, that’s easy.

THE FISHERMAN

Your wife, yes? Sorry, very sorry. I know it’s tough. Did I tell you my wife and I met at a funeral? Uncle Marvin. Ace Restaurant Supplies. A fleet of four and twenty trucks to serve you. Massive heart attack.

TOBIAS

Uncle Marvin.

THE FISHERMAN

He was her uncle. A big shot in paper napkins and styrofoam cups. Did business with my father. You know what they say: There’s a bride at every funeral and a corpse at every wedding. So are you still saying the Kaddish for her?

TOBIAS

Time for me to get going.

THE FISHERMAN

I always recognize another Jew. A Jew is like one of the berries on this bush. Sweet yet tart. That’s a Jew.

(Picking and eating berries.)

O I love to stand here and eat berries. Makes me feel like I belong on the Earth. Have one, why don’t you? Here, come on, take one.

(TOBIAS holds his hand up to refuse the offered berry.)

THE FISHERMAN (cont’d.)

That’s a Jew. Unwise in the ways of the world yet suspicious of the ways of the world. Won’t...take...a...berry. Here, come on, take one. It’s good.

(Again TOBIAS refuses the berry. A pause.)

THE FISHERMAN (cont’d.)

Won’t take a berry. Won’t say the Kaddish.

TOBIAS

It doesn’t mean anything to me and I won’t pretend.

THE FISHERMAN

What else is prayer but pretending? Who could be so foolish as to think mere words could change reality? But you married her didn’t you? You made vows. Words then deeds.

TOBIAS

I don’t believe in God.

THE FISHERMAN

God? Ha! What’s God got to do with it? God? That also is a good one. Notice it’s you who brought God up, not me. Notice it’s you who doesn’t believe in God using God as a reason not to do something. Sometimes faith leads you to the prayer, other times the prayer leads you to faith.

TOBIAS

People who keep talking about faith, they’re the ones to watch out for. They’re the ones with the problem.

THE FISHERMAN

Exactly right. Having faith is like having good digestion. Whether you got it or not you still hafta eat, Bubbie.

TOBIAS

Look, I like talking to you. I admit it. There’s something familiar, very familiar. We all know about it. It’s the oldest thing in the world. But don’t take it too far. Don’t push. Okay?

THE FISHERMAN

Okay, okay. But just between you, me and the rocks: Not only have I been talking to God, I’ve been talking to fish. The fish are moving in their dark element, like we do, knowing nothing of what goes on above the surface. From fish and from men reality is equally hidden. Look, my sick heart was cut from my body and a dead man’s heart put in its place so don’t you think I should talk to God and animals?

TOBIAS

Who are you?

THE FISHERMAN

They won’t reveal my heart donor’s name. Some families prefer anonymity. I can see that. You touch a stranger’s life, wanting nothing but to be allowed to give. A loss can be balanced that way.

(Singing.)

And then one day a beast I hooked

Spoke did he with the voice of a man

But like a fish he looked…

(Then sharply.)

I’m an old man. I fish here. Been doing it for years. See, in the tub, the big guy I caught already?

TOBIAS

What is that?

THE FISHERMAN

A carp.

TOBIAS

Alive?

THE FISHERMAN

Alive? Sure he’s alive and he’ll be alive three more days.

TOBIAS

Why?

THE FISHERMAN

Because I need him fresh on Friday or he won’t taste good. Turn sour on me. Nothing worse than a turned carp. So I’ll keep him alive until Friday afternoon when I’ll kill that wild creature and turn him into sweet, delicate Gefilte fish tasting of warm rooms, cotton dresses and land belonging to the one who works it. So say hello to the fish, why don’t you?

TOBIAS

What?

THE FISHERMAN

Say hello to the fish.

TOBIAS

He wants me to talk to the fish?

THE FISHERMAN

I do I told you. I talk to fish.

TOBIAS

What’s that like?

THE FISHERMAN

It’s just like talking to you, Mister.

(TOBIAS laughs.)

THE FISHERMAN (cont’d.)

So have a nice berry why don’t you?

(TOBIAS takes the berry.)

THE FISHERMAN (cont’d.)

Good eh? Now you understand: We belong to each other. We come from the same bush. Now about your wife…

TOBIAS

It was a car accident last December.

THE FISHERMAN

And you met her where?

TOBIAS

In Spain.

THE FISHERMAN

Spain, ah well, Spain.

TOBIAS

At a bullfight in Seville. That first night we went down to the river she takes her clothes off and swims out.

THE FISHERMAN

Clothes off? On the first night?

TOBIAS

She was wild. I was a New York kid. Complex, wordy. Used to rooms and talk in rooms. Not the wide open night. Not gypsy guitars. Not risking arrest. Used to arguing the rules not breaking them. She was beautiful. I was trembling, white and shy in the moonlight. Told her I was cold.

THE FISHERMAN

I like you. You’re okay. So where do you live now?

TOBIAS

Just down the hill. On Belvedere Road.

THE FISHERMAN

The number. I need the number of your house.

TOBIAS

Why?

THE FISHERMAN

Because I want to do something for you, something nice. Understand?

TOBIAS

No.

THE FISHERMAN

Good. Because I’m giving you this fish to take home.

TOBIAS

I don’t want the fish.

THE FISHERMAN

He’s a gift. Take him and keep him alive until Friday afternoon.

TOBIAS

I don’t want the fish.

THE FISHERMAN

Remember: He can’t stay in this little tub. He’ll need a bigger place to swim like a bathtub with water running in to replenish the oxygen. Friday afternoon, I’ll come over and we’ll make a beautiful Sabbath meal with him as the appetizer: Light the candles, say the blessings, sing. Okay? Do we have a deal? Now, I need your address.

TOBIAS

I’m not having a Sabbath meal.

(THE FISHERMAN resumes fishing.)

THE FISHERMAN

Your address.

TOBIAS

No Sabbath meal, understand? Not this Friday or any Friday.

THE FISHERMAN

The number.

TOBIAS

I’m not from your bush. Crazy old man!

THE FISHERMAN

Tell me the number of your house. Now!!!

TOBIAS

3602 Belvedere. Second house from the corner.

THE FISHERMAN

See you in three days. Keep him alive. Lots of water. Three days are all I ask.

(In his own world now, THE FISHERMAN fishes. A pause.)

TOBIAS

You want me to take the fish? You need to give me the fish?

(THE FISHERMAN fishes. A pause.)

TOBIAS (cont’d.)

In the bathtub. Grandma sometimes kept a carp like that, back in Brooklyn. Grandpa couldn’t take his bath.

(TOBIAS exits carrying metal tub. Lights up on ANNA and LINCOLN in Job Site Office.)

LINCOLN

People need water, Anna. Civilization is impossible without adequate delivery systems. Where do you find the first large civilizations? On the shores of great rivers: The Tigris, the Euphrates, the Nile.

ANNA

I like your forearms, the color, the muscles.

LINCOLN

Neighborhoods tend to get uncivilized if they don’t have their water.

ANNA

Forearms like these don’t just happen.

LINCOLN

It’s why Continental works fast. Sometimes two shifts a day ‘til the job’s done. If we’re really behind we’ll set up spotlights and work through the night.

ANNA

Forearms like these are the result of a certain kind of life.

(TOBIAS approaches house carrying with fish’s tub. Lights up on bathtub in house.)

LINCOLN

Anna...Anna, there’s this strange guy goin’ into your house?

(TOBIAS begins filling bathtub with water for fish.)

ANNA

It’s my father back from his morning walk.

LINCOLN

Your father? Walking? At 3 AM?

ANNA

Like someone in a dream.

(LINCOLN starts getting himself together for work.)

LINCOLN

How could I let this happen? Me, the foreman, breaking job site prohibitions: “There is to be no parkin’ in front of a house, no goin’ in a house and no consortin’ with the homeowner.”

ANNA

We’re not staying out here.

LINCOLN

Dad always used to say, “The blood filling the human crotch comes directly from the human brain and that explains everything you need to know about the human race.” The human body is an inadequate delivery system.

(ANNA kisses LINCOLN, dazing him.)

ANNA

It’s not the first kiss that matters. The first kiss comes from pure nerve or foolishness or hunger.

LINCOLN

(Dazed by kiss.)

We’ll set a thousand foot of temporary pipe by the end of today. We’ll connect that pipe to every residence by quitting time tomorrow and start the drillin’ operation on Friday afternoon.

ANNA

It’s the second kiss that matters. The second kiss proves you can do it again after learning just how foolish or dangerous it is.

(ANNA kisses him again. TOBIAS dumps fish in tub, exits.)

LINCOLN

“There is to be no parkin’ in front of a house, no goin’ in a house, and no consortin’ with the homeowner.”

ANNA

Let’s go in.

LINCOLN

My crew finds out about me breakin’ job site prohibitions there will be trouble. Trouble, lawless confusion, chaos always starts at the top.

ANNA

You’re not refusing me?

LINCOLN

I just don’t want us to be the topic of a 6 AM conversation among drillmen in overalls drinkin’ 7-11 coffee