The Celebrity
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Why are they Celebrities?
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How many picked 'em?
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| Bob Hope | Comedian with Little 'Hope' | 39 |
| Ronald Reagan | Ex-Lucid-President | 36 |
| Pope John Paul II | Pope on Geriatric dope | 24 |
| Dudley Moore | Actor Moore or Less | 21 |
| The Queen Mother | Former Queen in and out of a closet | 21 |
| Strom Thurmond | Political Figure - Needs to RETIRE | 20 |
| Katherine Hepburn | Actress - Kate at Heaven's gate | 19 |
| Milton Berle | Big Comedian - and we mean BIG | 18 |
| Buddy Ebsen | Actor Clamp-It shut | 15 |
| Ted Williams | Old Baseball Player | 13 |
| Fay Wray | Actress - Grey Wray | 12 |
| John Gotti Sr. | Very Nice Fella | 11 |
| Madame Chiang Kai-Shek | Wife of Politician | 11 |
| Boris Yeltsin | Russian Lush President | 10 |
| Kirk Douglas | Actor with a slur | 9 |
| Richard Pryor | Comedian - Caught on fire | 9 |
| Robert Downey Jr. | Smack fiend | 9 |
| Darryl Strawberry | Baseball Player | 8 |
| Johnny Cash | Singer/Jailbird | 8 |
| Elizabeth Taylor | Wacky Actress | 7 |
| Al McGuire | Basketball Coach | 6 |
| Anne Morrow-Lindbergh | Wife of Charlie the Pilot | 6 |
| Billy Wilder | Director | 6 |
| Dale Evans | Actress Yea-ha | 6 |
| Julia Child | Chef Cholesterol Bomb | 6 |
| Billy Graham | Evangelist | 5 |
| Don Knotts | Andy's Main Squeeze | 5 |
| Eddie Albert | Actor - Green Pastures | 5 |
| Eunice Kennedy-Shriver | Old Kennedy | 5 |
| Hume Cronyn | Actor | 5 |
| Mel Stottlemyre | Baseball Player | 5 |
| Al Hirschfeld | Characiture Artisit | 4 |
| Alistair Cooke | Guy in Leather Chair | 4 |
| Annette Funicello | Peanut Buttery Actress | 4 |
| Dick Cheney | Politician | 4 |
| Emily Couric | VA Senator and Katie's Sister | 4 |
| Gerald Ford | Bumbling President | 4 |
| Harold Stassen | Presidential Wanna-be | 4 |
| Harry Morgan | Wife Beater | 4 |
| Joey Bishop | Last Rat Packer | 4 |
| Lady Bird Johnson | Lydon's squeeze | 4 |
| Leni Riefenstahl | Nazi Film Chick | 4 |
| Mortimer J. Adler | Philosipher | 4 |
| Perry Como | Singer | 4 |
| Rosa Parks | Sat at front of bus | 4 |
| Arlene Francis | Perennial Panelist | 3 |
| Art Carney | Actor, Barney Rubble Prototype | 3 |
| Arthur C. Clarke | Author | 3 |
| Augusto Pinochet | Nasty fella from Chile | 3 |
| Carroll O'Connor | Actor | 3 |
| Eddie Mathews | Baseball Player | 3 |
| Edward Teller | Father of H-Bomb | 3 |
| Elizabeth Kubler Ross | Author on Death and Dying | 3 |
| Estee Lauder | Cosmetics billionaire | 3 |
| Hugh Hefner | Matt's Idol | 3 |
| Imogene Coca | Actress | 3 |
| Jerry Lewis | Dean's ex-partner | 3 |
| Keith Richards | Rock & Roll Pharmacist | 3 |
| Mickey Rooney | Short Actor | 3 |
| Rodney Dangerfield | Comedian | 3 |
| Simon Wiesenthal | Nazi hunter | 3 |
| Stephen Hawking | Smart Guy | 3 |
| Ted Kennedy | Old drunk from unlucky family | 3 |
| William Westmoreland | General, Vietnam | 3 |
| Yasser Arafat | PLO Leader | 3 |
| Andy Griffith | Matlock et al. | 2 |
| B. B. King | Musician | 2 |
| Calista Flockhart | Thin Actress | 2 |
| Carol Channing | Weird Looking Actress | 2 |
| Charles Lane | Actor | 2 |
| Claude Levi-Strauss | Anthropologist | 2 |
| Dick Trickle | Nascar Driver | 2 |
| Eddy Arnold | Country Singer | 2 |
| Elia Kazan | I do believe I know some Commies | 2 |
| Eminem | White Rapper | 2 |
| Ernest Borgnine | Actor | 2 |
| Eudora Welty | Author | 2 |
| Fidel Castro | Made convertable bed | 2 |
| Fiona Apple | Singer | 2 |
| Glenn Ford | Actor | 2 |
| Gloria Stuart | Actress | 2 |
| Hal Haig (Harry) Prieste | Oldest Olympian | 2 |
| Henri Cartier-Bresson | Photographer | 2 |
| J.D. Salinger | A Catcher in the Rye | 2 |
| Jack Klugman | Actor Pull the Plug-man | 2 |
| Jack Lemmon | Actor | 2 |
| Jim Nabors | Gomer Pyle | 2 |
| John Goodman | Fat Actor | 2 |
| John Wooden | Basketball Player | 2 |
| Johnny Carson | Tonight Show host | 2 |
| Karl Malden | Actor - Big nose, big smell | 2 |
| Lew Burdette | Former Baseball Pitcher | 2 |
| Lionel Hampton | Jazz Pioneer | 2 |
| Liza Minnelli | Friend of Sinatra | 2 |
| Marlon Brando | Fat Actor/Bad Parent | 2 |
| Mimi Farina | Bread and Roses Founder | 2 |
| Penny Singleton | Actress | 2 |
| Prince Rainier | Prince of Monaco | 2 |
| Princess Juliana | Queen of Netherlands | 2 |
| Red Auerbach | Former Celtics' Coach | 2 |
| Robert Guillaume | Actor - Benson | 2 |
| Ruth Bader Ginsburg | Judge | 2 |
| Saddam Hussein | Nasty Ass | 2 |
| Sean Puffy Combs | Rapper, Producer | 2 |
| Sir Harry Secombe | Comedian/Singer | 2 |
| Tammy Faye Bakker | Lots of make-up | 2 |
| Tony Curtis | Actor-Some Like It Cold, Very Cold | 2 |
| Walter Annenberg | Diplomat/Philanthropist | 2 |
| Walter Cronkite | News Guy | 2 |
| Willie Stargell | Baseball Player | 2 |
| Aileen Riggin Soule | Oldest Gold Medalist | 1 |
| Al Molinaro | Character Actor | 1 |
| Alberto Fujimori | Former President of Argentina | 1 |
| Alex Higgins | Professional Snooker Palyer | 1 |
| Alexandru Salca | Author/Ex War Prisoner | 1 |
| Allen Jerkins | Horse Racing Trainer | 1 |
| Alonzo Mourning | Basketball Player | 1 |
| Ann Landers | Know-it-all | 1 |
| Ann Southern | Actress | 1 |
| Anne Heche | Ellen's former squeeze | 1 |
| Aretha Franklin | Singer | 1 |
| Ariel Sharon | Israeli foreign minister | 1 |
| Arnold O. Beckman | Invented the pH Meter | 1 |
| Artie Shaw | Musician | 1 |
| Audrey Geisel | Suess' Wife | 1 |
| Ben Holcomb | Oldest Living Man | 1 |
| Benny Carter | Jazz Musician | 1 |
| Bill Bradley | Politician | 1 |
| Bill France Jr. | Ex-Nascar President | 1 |
| Billie Bird | Actress | 1 |
| Billy Bob Thornton | Sling Blade guy | 1 |
| Bobbi Olson | Wife of Arizona Wildcat's Coach | 1 |
| Bobby Knight | Nutty Basketball Coach | 1 |
| Bradley Walsh | UK Game Show Host | 1 |
| Brett Butler | She-man | 1 |
| Bruce Foresight | Some British Dude | 1 |
| Bum Philipps | Football Coach | 1 |
| Charles Durning | Actor | 1 |
| Charley Pell | Football Coach | 1 |
| Christian Slater | Actor, Dope Head | 1 |
| Christopher Reeve | Superman of the Disabled | 1 |
| Clint Eastwood | Make My Day | 1 |
| Colin Powell | General | 1 |
| Count Balthazar | Painter | 1 |
| Dale Messick | Created Brenda Starr | 1 |
| Daniella Westbrook | Actress | 1 |
| Dave Thomas (Mr. Wendy's) | Wendy's Guy | 1 |
| David Blaine | Magician | 1 |
| David Brinkley | Wrinkly Announcer | 1 |
| David Letterman | Late Show Host | 1 |
| Deborah Kerr | Actress | 1 |
| Dennis Weaver | Actor | 1 |
| Desmond Tutu | South African Religous Leader | 1 |
| Dick Van Dyke | Actor/Comedian | 1 |
| Dolores Hope | Bob's Gal | 1 |
| Doris Day | Actress | 1 |
| Duke Snider | Baseball Player | 1 |
| Estelle Getty | Actress Getty up and Go! | 1 |
| Ethel Kennedy | Another Kennedy | 1 |
| Fred Rogers | Mr. Rogers | 1 |
| Freddie Fender | Singer | 1 |
| Geoffrey Richmond | Bradford Soccer Chairman | 1 |
| George Best | English Soccer Star | 1 |
| George Beverly Shea | Gospel Singer | 1 |
| George Bush Sr. | Ex-President-Read Blue Lips | 1 |
| George Steinbrenner | Yankee Dude | 1 |
| George W. Bush | President of US | 1 |
| Gilbert Roland | Actor | 1 |
| Grace Slick | Don't You Want Somebody To Die | 1 |
| Greg Louganis | Diver | 1 |
| Gunter Gabel Williams | Lion Tamer | 1 |
| Hank the Angry Drunken Dwarf | Drinks lots for Stern | 1 |
| Hans-Georg Gadamer | Philosophy Researcher/Author | 1 |
| Herb L. Block | Political Caroonist | 1 |
| Hunter Kelly | Jim Kelly's boy | 1 |
| Iggy Pop | Musician | 1 |
| Isabel Sanford | Mrs. Jefferson | 1 |
| Jane Withers | Actress | 1 |
| Jason Priestly | Actor, Drinker | 1 |
| Jay Z | Rapper | 1 |
| Jean Belliveau | Hockey Player | 1 |
| Jeremy Allford | Online Gaming Pioneer | 1 |
| Jesse Helms | Politiician | 1 |
| Jesse Jackson | Racist | 1 |
| Jessica Simpson | Annoying Teen Singer | 1 |
| Jim Marshall | Football Player | 1 |
| Jim McKay | Writer/Director | 1 |
| Joan Kennedy | Mrs. Drunkard | 1 |
| Joe Barbera | Cartoon fella | 1 |
| Joey Butafucco | Loser | 1 |
| John Brodie | Fotball Player | 1 |
| John Glenn | Astronaut | 1 |
| John Kenneth Galbraith | Economist/Author | 1 |
| John Lee Hooker | Blues Musicain | 1 |
| John Schneider | U.S. Attorney for North Dakota | 1 |
| John Steadman | Baltimore Sports Writer | 1 |
| Johnny Paycheck | Singer/Songwirter | 1 |
| Joseph Lieberman | Little Mensch | 1 |
| June Lockhart | Actress | 1 |
| Kate Moss | Chickee Pooh | 1 |
| Kim Mathers | Eminem's Wife | 1 |
| King Fahad | King of Saudi Arabia | 1 |
| King Norodom Sihanouk | Cambodian King | 1 |
| Kitty Carlisle-Hart | Game Show Chick | 1 |
| Kurt Vonnegut | Author | 1 |
| Lamar Lundy | Football Hall of Famer | 1 |
| Lara Flynn Boyle | Actress | 1 |
| Larry Doby | First black in American League | 1 |
| Latrell Sprewell | Punched Coach | 1 |
| Le Duc Anh | Former President of Vietnam | 1 |
| Len Vale-Onslow | Motorcyclying Legend | 1 |
| Leon Askin | Actor | 1 |
| Leslie Nielson | Actor | 1 |
| Leslie Quick Jr. | Investment Banker | 1 |
| Llyod Bensten | Politician | 1 |
| Lou Boudreau | Baseball Hall of Famer | 1 |
| Louis Farrakahn | Racist | 1 |
| Magic Johnson | Major libido | 1 |
| Marie Bremont | World's oldest Woman | 1 |
| Marion Barry | Crackhead/Politician | 1 |
| Martha Kostyra | Martha Stewart's Mom | 1 |
| Martin Landau | Guy from Space 1999 | 1 |
| Mary Wighthouse | Has Show on BBC | 1 |
| Maryln Manson | Rock Star | 1 |
| Matthew Perry | Friend of pills | 1 |
| Max Schmeling | German Boxer | 1 |
| Melvin Richard | Former Miami Beach Mayor | 1 |
| Merlin Olson | Football Player | 1 |
| Merlyn Mantle | Mickey's wife | 1 |
| Michael J. Fox | Actor | 1 |
| Michael Raoul-Duval | Nixon Legal Adviser | 1 |
| Michael Stasinopoulos | Former President of Greece | 1 |
| Mike Mansfield | Politician & Former Senator | 1 |
| Mike Tyson | Ear Eater | 1 |
| Mike Wallace | 60 Minutes dude | 1 |
| Mildred Wirt Benson | Author | 1 |
| Morton Downey Jr. | Loud Mouth | 1 |
| Muhammad Ali | Boxer | 1 |
| Nancy Reagan | Ron's Wife | 1 |
| Naomi Judd | Singer | 1 |
| Nelson Mandela | Fella in Dashiki | 1 |
| Nicole Bass | Female Body Builder | 1 |
| O. J. Simpson | Murderer | 1 |
| Olivia de Havilland | Actress | 1 |
| Oral Roberts | Preacher | 1 |
| Osama Bin Laden | Nasty ass | 1 |
| Pat Kennedy Lawford | A Hybrid | 1 |
| Pat Weaver | Daughter with Alien problem | 1 |
| Paul Pena | Tuvan throat singer | 1 |
| Paul Stewart | Jaguar Executive | 1 |
| Peggy Lee | Singer | 1 |
| Pete Seeger | Musicain | 1 |
| Pete Wysocki | Football Player | 1 |
| Phyllis Diller | Comedian | 1 |
| Prince Albert | In a Can | 1 |
| Prince William | Liitle Punk | 1 |
| Queen Elizabeth II | Queen of England | 1 |
| Ray Bradbury | Author | 1 |
| Ringo Starr | Beatle | 1 |
| Robbie Knievel | Evel's Boy | 1 |
| Robert Earl Jones | James' Dad | 1 |
| Robert Spangler | Confessed Murderer | 1 |
| Roone Arledge | ABC Sports Personality | 1 |
| Rosalyn Carter | Jimmy's Squeeze | 1 |
| Rose Marie | Actress/Comedian | 1 |
| Roseanne Barr | Load | 1 |
| Rosemary Glancy | White Collar Criminal | 1 |
| Rudy Guliani | NYC Mayor | 1 |
| Sandra Day O'Connor | Justice | 1 |
| Scott Weiland | Stoned Temple Pilot | 1 |
| Sid Gillman | Football Hall of Famer | 1 |
| Sir John Mills | Actor | 1 |
| Slobodan Milosevic | Yugosolian President | 1 |
| Smokey Yunick | Race Car Designer | 1 |
| Spike Milligan | British Comic | 1 |
| Stan Musial | Baseball Player, Stan-the-Man | 1 |
| Steve Hill | Actor (Law & Order) | 1 |
| Tad Szulc | Author/Biographer | 1 |
| Timothy McVeigh | Killer | 1 |
| Tony Dow | Wally from Leave It To Beaver | 1 |
| Vaclav Havel | Political Leader | 1 |
| Vanessa Redgrave | Actress | 1 |
| Viktor Hamburger | Biologist on a Bun | 1 |
| W. Clement Stone | Insurance Magnate | 1 |
| Whitey Ford | Baseball Player | 1 |
| Whitney Houston | Looney gal | 1 |
| William Hanna | Cartoon fella | 1 |
| Yogi Berra | Boo Boo's pal | 1 |
| Yoko Ono | Leach | 1 |