I got the email today that it has been accepted for publication. Keep your eyes open in the next few months for it and as always I will keep you updated on it :)

My new book "The Devil's scream is going to be submitted soon to publishers. I am as nervous as I was with my first book. It's like sending your child to be evaluated for emotion, personality and likeablity and then having to wait weeks to find out if they are acceptable.

I really had a lot of fun writing it and am hoping for the best.

and I am ready. My Nanowrimo book from last year was published and getting great reviews. Yes, "The Lost Are Never Far" was written in less than 30 days. This year I am going straight horror with my new book "The Devil's Scream". I'm hoping this book does well and turns out as well as it is in my head.

Wish me luck as I embark on yet another year of feverish writing that will take up most of my time in November.

I used to worry about if my writing was good enough, if I was good enough. I was terrified of reviews and what readers would say. I have to admit now to a huge ego boost as my reviews are coming in. It makes me want to keep creating stories for people to enjoy :)

So yesterday my seven year old was put on Adderall much to my dismay. I have battled for years trying to get her help for her SPD and I did it. I thought okay things will get better-they didn't.

 

She struggled daily in school and couldn't sit still for more than five minutes straight. She was constantly battling with her siblings and playing rough with the dogs and now well she's not. So why do I feel so bad about it?

 

I feel like I lost my little girl. Everyone said I would love the change and I don't. She doesn't smile like she did before. She doesn't roll with laughter and she seems to have lost that little spark that made her my Nonie Monster (her nickname).

 

She has sat around for two days sorting and resorting cards, laying around and complaining of stomach aches. I miss the craziness, I miss the laughter, I miss the little girl I had just days ago. I hope soon the meds will have been in her system long enough to see if that spark will come back, but for now I just miss her.

One of my favorite sayings and one I have to live by more often. I had a major SPD meltdown yesterday, which resulted in doubling up on xanax and heading to bed. I blocked out the world and hid in my little sanctuary for most of the day.

 

My dear friend called me and pulled me out of my pit of self pity and reminded me of the old hippie saying- Today is the first day of the rest of your life. This saying came about in the sixties though many people don't realize that. To every person it could mean something else, but yesterday I learned what it meant to me-hope.

 

In my two year old like tantrum I deleted my author site and everything that had to do with any of my writing. I was ready to give up on the one thing that brought me happiness and I was wrong. Today I woke up and I am starting fresh. So in all actuality today is the first day of the rest of my life. I have changed, I have grown stronger, tougher and from this day forward I will never let anyone bring me down.

 

I have made it through so much, too much. So many others would have been ion a corner crying, but not me. I'm still here. So forgive me friends for my melt down, forgive me for not being a fighter and realize I will not allow others to change me. I will continue on being who I am and as I have been told my biggest fault is I'm too nice and my biggest asset is I'm too nice, that will not change. I will always respect others and be kind even when I shouldn't be. I will continue to help those who ask me for it and save the animals who can't speak for themselves. I will go on and never allow anyone to bring me down again.

 

In the words of one of my best friends Check ya later :)