LONG TERM THERAPY EFFECTIVE
TDN PRESS
NEW YORK--In its July issue, Do You Mind, Does It Matter, the nation's leading
Consummer advocacy publication, will present the results of a survey to which four thousand readers responded. Asked
candid and in-depth questions regarding mental health treatment, the majority of respondents were "highly satisfied
with the care they received. Most had made strides toward resolving the problems that led to treatment, and almost all
said life had become more manageable."
The data also clearly indicated that long-term therapy is more effective than short-term therapy,
particularly in the prevention of serious health problems such as hypertension, high blood pressure, and premature aging. "The
longer people stayed in therapy, the more they improved across the board in both mental and physical health. This suggests
that limited mental health coverage, with an emphasis on short-term treatment, may be a misguided move on the part of
the health insurance industry."
An insurance industry spokesperson poopooed the report and quickly cancelled his or her subscription
to the magazine. A Purple Cross CEO twitched when given the news, washed his or her hands several times, and popped
a Prozac. "Let them eat cake," he or she was reported to have mumbled.
LICENSE SUSPENDED
TDN PRESS
SACRAMENTO--Myah Steem, a family therapist in Saulsalito, recently
pleaded no contest to charges of violating client's confidentiality. As a result of the plea, her license
was suspended for six months.
Ms Steem had a practice of choosing an individual, couple or family as "client of the month"
and posting their picture in the waiting room. She claimed that all of her clients "really liked the concept,"
and that never in thirty years was a single complaint. "It wasn't until recently when several winey patients
complained that I never picked them for the honor. And I guess I made the mistake of telling them that obviously they
didn't deserve the honor," she told a TDN reporter.
The Board was also concerned about the Prize for being chosen client of the month--a weekend
stay in Ms Steem's timeshare with the understanding that the client would seriously consider buying into the time share.
For each new time share member, Ms Steem received two hundred dollars which she agreed to split with each patient in
the form of a free session!
FREUD STILL ALIVE
TDN
RIO--Brazilian psychoanalyst, Dr. Xavier Knutz,
reported seeing jolly ol' Sigmund dancing a libido dance with the natives of the rain forest deep inside the Brazilian jungle.
When asked if he were sure that it was indeed the famed psychiatrist, once thought to be dead, Dr Knutz answered, "Of course,
it's him. When the natives see him, they all chant, 'Zig-mum, Zig-mum.' Who else could it be?" Dr Knutz
intends to return to the scene of his Freud sighting with the hopes of interviewing the once thought to be dead analyst.
When confronted with the fact that Freud would be approximately 140 years old, Dr. Knutz simply but excitedly replied,
"God, isn't that amazing! That proves his theory--the libido never ages." TDN will definitely
continue to cover this story as it develops.
