Reject Sneakers

I remember when paying $30 for a pair of sneakers was a lot. Now, the average kid has twelve pairs of $150 sneakers. Paying that much money for something made in a sweatshop is ridiculous. Why is it a status symbol to have the most expensive pair of sneakers? I forgot, it makes you feel like a player. I say it’s time to take a stand against consumerism. Start wearing the cheapest and ugliest sneakers you can find: "Reject sneakers." Everyone’s so status conscious that it’s hard to find genuine rejects in America. You have to go all the way to Asia. You wouldn’t think Japan would be a haven for reject sneakers, but the selection here is overwhelming. It’s amazing how a melon can cost $30, but you can buy a pair of reject sneakers for $4. Manami Kano (TV director and writer from LA, living in Osaka) and I searched all over town for the one pair of sneakers that we could crown "King of All Reject Sneakers." —Matt

Note: $1=140 yen

PART I:

THE SHOES ARE CHEAP* TONDABAYASHI

*Kutsu ga Yasui. The name of the store doesn’t even mince words; just tell it like it is: the shoes are cheap! Matt and I posed like gaijin idiot students doing a research report so we wouldn’t get hassled by the obasan there who might have thought we were a rival reject shoe outlet. — Manami

TRENDER

¥850 (Made in China)

Matt: Trender. What a name! It has a velcro fastener.

Manami: Leading the reject sneaker revolution! Functional yet stylish with silver side reflectors for those late night walks in the streets of New York where the goodfellas can use your feet for target practice. Look how much rubber is on those soles. It’s like two inches!

Matt: Hey, you’re not paying for Air Jordans. That’s an important quality in a reject sneaker.

SASSON

¥1000 (Made in Korea)

Matt: Ooh la la Sasson. God these are ugly!

Manami: Hey, I used to wear those jeans in 5th grade. They come in fashionable maroon, beige or navy and they’re down from ¥2900. Look, there’s hair and dirt inside them, and the outsides are stained.

Matt: I think I’ll pass on Sasson.

KONEKO

¥1000

(Made in Japan. Vinyl with cotton lining)

Matt: These look like Sanrio rejects.

Manami: Hey, Mami might like these ‘cause there’s a cat’s pawprint on it. The detailing looks like it was done in whiteout—classy.

Matt: Vinyl is a sure sign of classic reject sneakers.

Apple by Asahi

¥2000 (Made in Japan)

Manami: Oh, Matt, these are it! Baby blue vinyl sneakers! The sidepanels are glittery silver nylon with "Apple" written across so nobody could mistake them for Airwalks!

Matt: Just hurry up and take the photo. You know how these Osaka obasan’s get....

Manami: Sheeet, I’m gonna have to buy these puppies. They’re only ¥2000. My brother was saying that the cholas back home were all sporting sneakers like these too. Cheap & Stylin’ !

PART II: DJ Q-BERT and D-STYLES DO NOT WEAR REJECT SNEAKERS

Manami decided to wear her Apple sneakers to Club Dawn, a trendy club in Osaka. Would she be stopped at the door and humilated for wearing rejects? No, she got in without a hassle. DJ Q-Bert and D-Styles of Invisibl Scratch Pickles of SF were playing and we managed to snag an interview with them. Unfortunately, the tape recorder I was using didn’t pick up one word of our conversation. Manami got pissed off at me because I ran downstairs in the middle of the interview to see Yamatsuka Eye’s new turntable project Sound Hero smash a bunch of fleamarket records, light them on fire, and toss them into the audience.

Manami insisted on putting her new rejects to the test against the sneakers worn by the two master turntabalists. DJ Q-Bert had on a pair of Adidas and D-Styles was decked out in a pair of New Balance. I’m no expert, but I think Manami’s Apple rejects held up pretty well against the brand names. DJ Q-Bert and D-Styles are world reknowned DJ’s who deserve to wear the very best footwear when they travel the globe. They’ve earned it with hard work. But if you’re some young punk DJ starting out, then you can’t be buying no $100 sneakers. Equipment and records cost money. Start off with a pair of $10 rejects and work your way up to the overpriced shoes. It will give you a sense of accomplishment and pride. Trust me.

PART III: REJECT SNEAKER EMPORIUM, OSAKA CITY*

*Okay, that's not the name. But the place exists. It's actually called Tomiyama.

Manami: This is the best warehouse. It’s like eight stories of reject sneakers. I used to live right around the corner near the sole factories, so these are locally made rejects.

Matt: There’s a bunch outside....

Manami: Let’s check out the top floor first...Can you smell that? Ahh, the aroma of recycled rubber.

CUTIE CORE

¥1380

(Made in China)

Matt: Look at these, Cute Core!

Manami: There’s something written in English on the label... "The Cute Magazine directs Cutie Core."

Matt: Wow, a sneaker with its own magazine!

Manami: For all those girls who are too cute to be hardcore, you have Cutie Core.

AIR SPORTS ONE

¥750

(Made in China)

Matt: Air Sports One, isn’t that a movie with Harrison Ford? Terrorists have hi-jacked the president’s sneakers!

Manami: Ugh, that line was worse than the sneakers. But for ¥750 they’re a steal.

Matt: What’s so bad about my idea? President Clinton is jogging when terrorist joggers or rollerbladers jump the Secret Service agents and steal the presidential sneakers. Clinton has to jog all the way to McDonalds barefooted...and um, there’s glass in the street...and rusty nails!

TEEM SPIRIT

¥980 (Made in China)

Matt: I can’t resist, I’m going to say it...Smells like Teem Spirit!

Manami: No comment.

Matt: If you click the heels together three times you get to be in the Foo Fighters. Avoid with caution.

HYPER ORUGA

¥750 Made in Japan

Manami: My vote for biggest rejects have got to be these. Vinyl upper, velcro closure and a rubber sole made from recycled tires.

Matt: The logo is an upside down Nike logo on top of two Addidas stripes. What is oruga anyway? It sounds some vegetable you put on a burrito. "I’ll have a burrito with hot sauce, sour cream, guacamole and oruga."

Manami: Matt, you’re really stretching for a comment on those, ay? Nevertheless, any sneaker inspired by a video game gets my support.

BRIDGESTONE by Asahi

¥1500 (Made in China)

(Soles made in Japan)

Matt: I always try to avoid a product with "by" in it. It reminds me of that bad cologne "Brut by Fabrege".

Manami: Watch it, Asahi’s also the maker of my stylin’’ Apples.

Matt: Well, then maybe Bridgestones will be big in LA. I don’t think a sneaker named after a tire company would go over well in New York.

STREET JACKS (Ivy Exes)

¥950 (Made in Japan)

Manami: These are named for that kid who got his $150 Nikes jacked, so for this price you won’t care if anybody jacks these.

Matt: Is that the term that’s used now, "jacked"? I never heard it before. Is it a West Coast expression? When I was young, the slang was "housed" as in "I just housed that fool’s sneakers." I like "jacked" much better. Remind me to integrate that word into my vocabulary. Oh...I see, it comes from "hi-jacked".

Manami: You sound like a damn hick. I know you’re really from Long Island fronting like you’re from New York.

Matt: What! That’s a low blow. I was born and raised in Brooklyn.

Manami: And why is it that people from New York act as if there’s some huge rivalry with LA, even a white boy from Great Neck?! I guess that would make me Tupac and you Notorious BIG.

Matt: I’ve never even been to Great Neck! Thanks to you, I’ll probably get my ass kicked if I ever set foot in LA. Okay, I give up. You win the war of words. Let’s just stick to our mission, finding the King of All Rejects.

ZAPATO

¥480 (Made in China)

Matt: This is it!!! I’ve found it. Lord have mercy! These are The King of All Reject Sneakers! Manami, check these out, they look like they’re made out of cardboard. My Spanish sucks, but isn’t the word for shoes, "zapatos?" Why are these called Zapato? Doesn’t that just mean "shoe" as in one shoe? I’m confused...

Manami: Are your sure you can part with ¥500 to buy those, big spender?

Matt: You bet I am! Zapato is not just a running shoe, it’s a work of art. You can’t put a price on art.

Part IV: Closing Words

Our quest had come to an end. Not many people would admit to buying cheap sneakers but we wore ours with pride. We reflected on what we learned from this ordeal.

Manami: All the Japanese kids are wearing 80’s style Vans, Addidas, K-Swiss and Zips, but they cost like $80! A fine line between fashion and rejects.

Matt: What about a pair of vintage Air Jordans? They sell for over $1000 in Japan. You know what’s ironic, the president of Nike got his start by importing a cheap running shoe from Japan called Onitsuka Tigers to America in the 60’s. Onitsuka Tigers were made right here in Osaka. One day his partner pressed the soles between a waffle iron and the modern running shoe was born. But why do they have to cost so much? I’m sticking to rejects.


				*EXILE OSAKA* *Reject Sneakers*



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		King of All Reject Sneakers by Matt Exile



		I remember when paying $30 for a pair of sneakers was a lot. Now, the average kid has twelve pairs of $150 sneakers. Paying that much money for something made in a sweatshop is ridiculous. Why is it a status symbol to have the most expensive pair of sneakers? I forgot, it makes you feel like a player. I say it’s time to take a stand against consumerism. Start wearing the cheapest and ugliest sneakers you can find: "Reject sneakers." Everyone’s so status conscious that it’s hard to find genuine rejects in America. You have to go all the way to Asia. You wouldn’t think Japan would be a haven for reject sneakers, but the selection here is overwhelming. It’s amazing how a melon can cost $30, but you can buy a pair of reject sneakers for $4. Manami Kano (TV director and writer from LA, living in Osaka) and I searched all over town for the one pair of sneakers that we could crown "King of All Reject Sneakers." —Matt Note: $1=140 yen PART I: THE SHOES ARE CHEAP* TONDABAYASHI Kutsu ga Yasui. The name of the store doesn’t even mince words; just tell it like it is: the shoes are cheap! Matt and I posed like gaijin idiot students doing a research report so we wouldn’t get hassled by the obasan there who might have thought we were a rival reject shoe outlet. — Manami TRENDER ¥850 (Made in China) Matt: Trender. What a name! It has a velcro fastener. Manami: Leading the reject sneaker revolution! Functional yet stylish with silver side reflectors for those late night walks in the streets of New York where the goodfellas can use your feet for target practice. Look how much rubber is on those soles. It’s like two inches! Matt: Hey, you’re not paying for Air Jordans. That’s an important quality in a reject sneaker. SASSON ¥1000 (Made in Korea) Matt: Ooh la la Sasson. God these are ugly! Manami: Hey, I used to wear those jeans in 5th grade. They come in fashionable maroon, beige or navy and they’re down from ¥2900. Look, there’s hair and dirt inside them, and the outsides are stained. Matt: I think I’ll pass on Sasson. KONEKO ¥1000 (Made in Japan. Vinyl with cotton lining) Matt: These look like Sanrio rejects. Manami: Hey, Mami might like these ‘cause there’s a cat’s pawprint on it. The detailing looks like it was done in whiteout—classy. Matt: Vinyl is a sure sign of classic reject sneakers. Apple by Asahi ¥2000 (Made in Japan) Manami: Oh, Matt, these are it! Baby blue vinyl sneakers! The sidepanels are glittery silver nylon with "Apple" written across so nobody could mistake them for Airwalks! Matt: Just hurry up and take the photo. You know how these Osaka obasan’s get.... Manami: Sheeet, I’m gonna have to buy these puppies. They’re only ¥2000. My brother was saying that the cholas back home were all sporting sneakers like these too. Cheap & Stylin’ ! PART II: DJ Q-BERT and D-STYLES DO NOT WEAR REJECT SNEAKERS Manami decided to wear her Apple sneakers to Club Dawn, a trendy club in Osaka. Would she be stopped at the door and humilated for wearing rejects? No, she got in without a hassle. DJ Q-Bert and D-Styles of Invisibl Scratch Pickles of SF were playing and we managed to snag an interview with them. Unfortunately, the tape recorder I was using didn’t pick up one word of our conversation. Manami got pissed off at me because I ran downstairs in the middle of the interview to see Yamatsuka Eye’s new turntable project Sound Hero smash a bunch of fleamarket records, light them on fire, and toss them into the audience. Manami insisted on putting her new rejects to the test against the sneakers worn by the two master turntabalists. DJ Q-Bert had on a pair of Adidas and D-Styles was decked out in a pair of New Balance. I’m no expert, but I think Manami’s Apple rejects held up pretty well against the brand names. DJ Q-Bert and D-Styles are world reknowned DJ’s who deserve to wear the very best footwear when they travel the globe. They’ve earned it with hard work. But if you’re some young punk DJ starting out, then you can’t be buying no $100 sneakers. Equipment and records cost money. Start off with a pair of $10 rejects and work your way up to the overpriced shoes. It will give you a sense of accomplishment and pride. Trust me. PART III: REJECT SNEAKER EMPORIUM, OSAKA CITY *Okay, that's not the name. But the place exists. It's actually called Tomiyama. Manami: This is the best warehouse. It’s like eight stories of reject sneakers. I used to live right around the corner near the sole factories, so these are locally made rejects. Matt: There’s a bunch outside.... Manami: Let’s check out the top floor first...Can you smell that? Ahh, the aroma of recycled rubber. CUTIE CORE ¥1380 (Made in China) Matt: Look at these, Cute Core! Manami: There’s something written in English on the label... "The Cute Magazine directs Cutie Core." Matt: Wow, a sneaker with its own magazine! Manami: For all those girls who are too cute to be hardcore, you have Cutie Core. AIR SPORTS ONE ¥750 (Made in China) Matt: Air Sports One, isn’t that a movie with Harrison Ford? Terrorists have hi-jacked the president’s sneakers! Manami: Ugh, that line was worse than the sneakers. But for ¥750 they’re a steal. Matt: What’s so bad about my idea? President Clinton is jogging when terrorist joggers or rollerbladers jump the Secret Service agents and steal the presidential sneakers. Clinton has to jog all the way to McDonalds barefooted...and um, there’s glass in the street...and rusty nails! TEEM SPIRIT ¥980 (Made in China) Matt: I can’t resist, I’m going to say it...Smells like Teem Spirit! Manami: No comment. Matt: If you click the heels together three times you get to be in the Foo Fighters. Avoid with caution. HYPER ORUGA ¥750 Made in Japan Manami: My vote for biggest rejects have got to be these. Vinyl upper, velcro closure and a rubber sole made from recycled tires. Matt: The logo is an upside down Nike logo on top of two Addidas stripes. What is oruga anyway? It sounds some vegetable you put on a burrito. "I’ll have a burrito with hot sauce, sour cream, guacamole and oruga." Manami: Matt, you’re really stretching for a comment on those, ay? Nevertheless, any sneaker inspired by a video game gets my support. BRIDGESTONE by Asahi ¥1500 (Made in China) (Soles made in Japan) Matt: I always try to avoid a product with "by" in it. It reminds me of that bad cologne "Brut by Fabrege". Manami: Watch it, Asahi’s also the maker of my stylin’’ Apples. Matt: Well, then maybe Bridgestones will be big in LA. I don’t think a sneaker named after a tire company would go over well in New York. STREET JACKS (Ivy Exes) ¥950 (Made in Japan) Manami: These are named for that kid who got his $150 Nikes jacked, so for this price you won’t care if anybody jacks these. Matt: Is that the term that’s used now, "jacked"? I never heard it before. Is it a West Coast expression? When I was young, the slang was "housed" as in "I just housed that fool’s sneakers." I like "jacked" much better. Remind me to integrate that word into my vocabulary. Oh...I see, it comes from "hi-jacked". Manami: You sound like a damn hick. I know you’re really from Long Island fronting like you’re from New York. Matt: What! That’s a low blow. I was born and raised in Brooklyn. Manami: And why is it that people from New York act as if there’s some huge rivalry with LA, even a white boy from Great Neck?! I guess that would make me Tupac and you Notorious BIG. Matt: I’ve never even been to Great Neck! Thanks to you, I’ll probably get my ass kicked if I ever set foot in LA. Okay, I give up. You win the war of words. Let’s just stick to our mission, finding the King of All Rejects. ZAPATO ¥480 (Made in China) Matt: This is it!!! I’ve found it. Lord have mercy! These are The King of All Reject Sneakers! Manami, check these out, they look like they’re made out of cardboard. My Spanish sucks, but isn’t the word for shoes, "zapatos?" Why are these called Zapato? Doesn’t that just mean "shoe" as in one shoe? I’m confused... Manami: Are your sure you can part with ¥500 to buy those, big spender? Matt: You bet I am! Zapato is not just a running shoe, it’s a work of art. You can’t put a price on art. Part IV: Closing Words Our quest had come to an end. Not many people would admit to buying cheap sneakers but we wore ours with pride. We reflected on what we learned from this ordeal. Manami: All the Japanese kids are wearing 80’s style Vans, Addidas, K-Swiss and Zips, but they cost like $80! A fine line between fashion and rejects. Matt: What about a pair of vintage Air Jordans? They sell for over $1000 in Japan. You know what’s ironic, the president of Nike got his start by importing a cheap running shoe from Japan called Onitsuka Tigers to America in the 60’s. Onitsuka Tigers were made right here in Osaka. One day his partner pressed the soles between a waffle iron and the modern running shoe was born. But why do they have to cost so much? I’m sticking to rejects.