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DABDWA in social settings
So there you are at the playground and you see Jason's mommy approach. "Oh no!", you think to yourself. "I
am going to have to listen to another diatribe on how poor Jason is picked on/misunderstood/so special, etc." Sure enough,
she starts right in on her perfect child's latest hardship and how, of course, it is everyone's fault but perfect Jason's.
You can pretend you are sick and run from the area with your hand over your mouth - but you can't keep doing
that or people will start to think you have some weird disease........
You can say, "Are you nuts? Do you even know what a bully your kid is?" But that
could cost you a friendship or start a fight or start people talking about how rude you are....
Or, you can smile, nod and calmly think to yourself, "DABDWA"
and then zone out and think about more pleasant things.
ADVANCED USERS - you can explain the concept of DABDWA,
but only to people that you are really close to. Then you can say DABDWA
out loud, with a smile on your face of course and then quickly change the topic to something safer; like gossip about someone
who is not there.
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DABDWA at the office
Okay, so picture this. You are sitting in another one of those endless meetings where someone from
another department is just pontificating on how he just knows that everyone could do a better job if they just did blah, blah,
blah.... And you are thinking, "Does he have a clue?" Or, "How many times do I have to tell him that is NOT how
it works?" Or on a really bad day, you may be thinking, "What an @!***"!
Well, you could just sit there, continue your internal dialague and get more and more aggravated........
Or, you could get all self righteous and interrupt and point out all the faults in his argument, but then
you might miss lunch.......
Or you could just calmly think to yourself - DABDWA! and wait
for him to run out of steam.
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DABDWA with friends and family
Life will be so much easier if you let your very close friends and family (but only the ones that you would keep as friends
if they weren't family) in on the DABDWA secret.
Then you can quickly and efficiently end unpleasant conversations before they start.
For example: Your best friend, who you love dearly, even though she feels the need to offer her unsolicited
opinion on every aspect of your life, says, "I really think you should try my hairdresser, she could make you look so
much younger." And you are thinking, "You must be kidding, you look like a hippy freak leftover from the 60's".
But you simply smile, take a sip of your drink, give one of those part laugh/part grunt/huh! noises and say "DABDWA". You can even
open your eyes wide and assume a knowing look for a subtle "we have had this conversation effect".
How great is that little word? No one gets their feelings hurt.
She goes on thinking that she looks fabulous, that you agree and that you are just afraid to try something new. And you
are happy that you have just cut that conversation off before it got ugly!
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