Stepping in the Same River Twice

They say it can’t be done.

Though despite the wisdom of the ages, I continue to try – in a multitude of ways.  I guess, perhaps, we all do.

The river looks the same – water, rocks, sun or clouds reflected on its rippling surface, muddy bottom, trees on either side or a steep or mellow bank – basically the same river. And yet – we know the very water rushing or gently passing by is not the same water that two minutes ago passed this spot in which I drop my toe, and surely neither am I the same for time has passed and I have learned and changed and grown, even if I cannot tell you how. As true as it was some 2500 years ago, when Heraclitus “the Obscure” of Ephesus wrote Western Philosophy’s  ‘book of change’, of which today we have but a few remaining fragments, you cannot step in the same river twice is still true today. (More about this early western Taoist can be found at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heraclitus )

So what river am I talking about today? The river that is the path no longer taken. Strangely, or perhaps astrologically ( it’s all the same), I am having the experience of being on a path, feeling myself move in a certain direction, and at the same time gathering up pieces of paths I am no longer drawn toward – that I thought I left.  Paths of former careers, paths of different routes in the martial arts, paths of different academic and philosophic interests. Perhaps it is not as it seems  - that I am jumping from one path over to the next and back again – though this definitely characterizes the first half of my life (assuming I have twice again as many years to go). But is rather, and finally at long last, the coming together of several different paths – merging like so many feeder streams into a great river.

And whether I can step into that great river twice is not really the question after all  - of greater concern to me is whether I can drink from it, swim in it, navigate it and ride with it – where I do not know. And let the feeder streams that represent the paths no longer taken nurture me in this river and not eddy and swirl in stagnant pools, but flow easily along.  Feeling a little bit like I do when I am practicing my long tai chi form – where one cannot step into the same single whip twice.

Enjoy Your River –

Dorian

Asking for What you Want

Are you good at asking for what you want?   Asking for help when you need it?  Letting someone who loves you know what you want for your birthday?  Asking for a favor around the house? Wishing upon a star? Dreaming big and actualizing your dreams?

Mom always said, “it never hurts to ask…the worse they can do is say ‘no’ and they might say ‘yes’,  - darlin’ - you will never know unless you ask.” The advice in general made sense and I thought I had it down pretty well. It turns out though, that is the simple version of things.

The more complex version tends to go something like this:  first, I am not entirely sure of exactly what I want – blue is nice, but brown looks better on me. Second, I am not entirely sure that I am deserving of exactly what I want – am I good enough?.  Of course, I learned to worry what others might think of my desire and therefore of me – you want that? . And then there is always the “be careful what you ask for……you may just get it.”  …..Why this is such an effective showstopper I’ll never understand, but it sure is.

Not unexpectedly, as my life has unfolded, I have tended to move more and more to the complex, adding on all these layers of doubt and difficulty.

Until recently it seems, as with most things in my life, Tai Chi has helped me see the need and the way to simplify – to eliminate the unnecessary tensions and complexities and to accomplish with the least effort.  It’s my birthday month, and I have been blessed with the opportunity to ask for what I want from a great number of people under various and wonderful circumstances – and in each case, they have either said yes or no. Period.

Sure you can’t always get what you want, but you can always ask. Asking is just expressing your desire – harmonizing your inner feelings, with your outer expressions and actions. You can’t be who are not and if there really is some cosmic judge of who deserves what, I can’t know the answer to that, and if I want blue and brown, maybe that is just fine too. As for being careful what you ask for…I agree – it is good tai chi to be willing to accept what comes your way, practice receiving, and from there you can learn neutralizing, enticing, borrowing, or whatever else you might consider. I have found much generosity in the world and in those I love – I wish the same for you.  Be who you are and…..

Enjoy asking for what you want –

Dorian

 

A Time for Training and a Time for Reflecting

Not much to say this week……

With summer in full swing and the annual training camps that happen in July and August  - the NWMAF’s Special Training, the IMAF’s Connecticut Modern Arnis Camp, Jan’s Push Hands Camp, and then PAWMA  - I am doing a lot more training than reflecting.

Of course, like yin and yang, there is always training within the times of reflection and vice versa. It reminds of this time of year – mid-summer abundance, and yet I see the coming autumn as a leaf or two on my favorite tree as already turned a reddish-yellow.

So I am taking notes to self and will look forward to sharing more reflections in the weeks to come. Meanwhile, go outside and ……

Enjoy your training

Dorian

NO POST THIS WEEK .....

 

 

(IN)SIGHT IS UNDER (RE)CONSTRUCTION

 

Please check back next week.