Little Billy came home
from school to see the families pet rooster dead in the front yard. Rigor mortis had set in and it was flat on its back with
its legs in the air. When his Dad came home Billy said, "Dad our roosters dead and his legs are sticking in the air. Why are
his legs sticking in the air?"
His father thinking quickly said, "Son, that's so God can reach down from the clouds
and lift the rooster straight up to heaven."
"Gee Dad that's great," said little Billy. A few days later, when Dad
came home from work, Billy rushed out to meet him yelling, "Dad, Dad we almost lost Mom today!"
"What do you mean?"
said Dad.
"Well Dad, I got home from school early today and went up to your bedroom and there was Mom flat on her
back with her legs in the air screaming, "Jesus I'm coming, I'm coming" If it hadn't of been for Uncle George holding her
down we'd have lost her for sure!"
A guy is talking to a girl in a bar. "What's
your name?" he asks. "Carmen," she says. "I had my name changed from 'Mary Lou' to 'Carmen' because I love cars and I love
men." "Cool," he answers. "What's your name?" she asks him. He thinks for a second. "Beersex."
Stacey edges Amanda Beard by one vote 6-5! Best Lady Athletes
Butt.