Just as courage takes its stand by others in challenging situations, so
compassion takes its stand with others in their distress. Compassion is a
virtue that takes seriously the reality of other persons, their inner lives,
their emotions, as well as their external circumstances. It is an active disposition
toward fellowship and sharing, toward supportive companionship in distress
or in woe. [Bennett, 107]
A few years ago, the President of the United States was getting ready to sign
a bill that would reduce some of the medical expenses of senior citizens. Like
all good politicians, he wanted to get as much publicity out of this event as
possible. With that in mind, he paid a visit to a nearby nursing home, where he
intended to announce the forthcoming signing. Inside the nursing home the President
walked up to a lady sitting in a wheel chair. He said to her: "Mam, do you
know whom I am and why I am here?" "No, sir, I don't," the woman
replied. Then she pointed to the nurses station in the middle of a long hall and
said, "But if you go up to that desk, maybe they can tell you." [adapted
from Joker]
Today is the first Sunday in the beginning of Lake Region's 2000-2001 congregational
year. As such, it is a very special time when it is most appropriate for us to
ask ourselves, once again: "Why are we here?" What does this
Fellowship mean to us, and, in turn, what do we mean to this Fellowship?
There are, naturally, as many different answers as there Members and Friends of
Lake Region. Nevertheless, I want to suggest to you this morning that they can
all be summarized under one single heading: "goodness."
Such goodness, however, takes three forms and each one of them is vital not only
to the life of this congregation, but also to the life of each of Lake Region's
Members and Friends.
[1] Why, then, are we here at Lake Region? The
first and most important reason is: to feel good. By that I don't mean
anything egotistical or selfish. I refer, instead, to something much more basic
and profound.
Psychologist Abraham Maslow expressed what I have in mind in his metaphor
of The Pyramid of Human Motives. According to him, those things which move
us to action in the world exist in a hierarchy. At the bottom of this hierarchical
pyramid are our most basic biological needs involving hunger, thirst and sex.
Above them lie our needs for safety, security, order and stability. Next higher
up are our needs for belonging and love. Ascending another step gets us to our
needs for esteem, self-respect, and success. Finally, at the very top, is our
need for self-actualization.
The crucial fact about this pyramid is that our needs at each level must be
satisfied before the higher motives at the next level can direct our behavior.
Maslow claimed that only a few people ever reach the highest level; and that because
most people's lower needs are never satisfied, they become stalled somewhere along
the way, having only rare and temporary "peak" experiences. [Houston,
254ff.]
Maslow's hierarchical schema is the inescapable foundation upon which every
congregation is built. Our ability to move beyond self-centered needs towards
a concern for others arises only as we scale the pyramid. This means that before
individuals and institutions can minister unto the world, they must first minister
unto themselves. Therefore, the first order of business for any congregation
is "to comfort the afflicted" within its own walls.
A congregation does this in two ways: by providing its members and friends a
place of refuge and sanctuary from the outside world which treats them with hostility;
and by providing them a place where they can find fellowship, friendship, and
the warmth of a loving spiritual family.
That is, in fact, what U.U. congregations do first, foremost, and best!
Most Unitarian Universalists were not "born and bred" within this denomination.
Most are "come-outers," persons who have come out of other denominations
to join this one. Why is that? In some cases it is because their previous denominations
were too conservative theologically or socially, and did not tolerate liberal
ideas or actions. In other cases it is because their former associates were too
sexist, racist, or homophobic to respect persons for who they are and not what
they are; for still others it is because the clergy or the laity in their past
group ostracized people on account of divorce or marriages which were "mixed"
religiously or racially.
Whether we have come out of another religion, or are just trying to find some
alternative to the all too often oppressive and offensive environments we have
to deal with in our jobs, at our children's schools, and within our city and county,
all of us who are here are in need of comfort from these afflictions. We have
come seeking shelter in a refuge, peace in a sanctuary, and friendship within
a fellowship.
Two of our seven Unitarian Universalist "Principles" directly
address these concerns. [Singing, x]
Principle #1 declares our belief in "the inherent worth and dignity
of every person." That is something we have not found elsewhere.
Principle #3 refers to our "acceptance of one another and [our] encouragement
to spiritual growth [with]in our congregations." That is what we seek
from and what we offer to one another; and the two major ways in which we do so
are through compassion and friendship.
William Bennett describes compassion well when he writes:
In her poetry, Emily Dickinson perhaps said it even better:
This past week, a tragic death occurred in the extended family of two of our members. Upon learning of this, one of these persons immediately made phone calls for help to several of us in this fellowship. Assistance was given in contacting the spouse. Arrangements were made for plane tickets. A ride to the airport was provided. Volunteers were found who could provide baby-sitting for a few days. All of these and other things were done by these members' friends who are a part of the spiritual family we have within this Fellowship. These folks helped ease a bit of the burden, helped do a little of the work, and helped overcome some of the worries in this crisis because that is what U.U.s do, because these two people were our friends, and because these kinds of things were what this grief-stricken couple have already done, many times, for others of us in this congregation!If I can stop one heart from breaking, shall not live in vain;
if I can ease one life [from] aching, or cool one pain,
or help one fainting robin into his nest again,
I shall not live in vain. [Bennett, 147]
The demands of friendship--for frankness, for self-revelation, for taking...criticisms as seriously as...praise, for stand-by-me loyalty, and for assistance to the point of self-sacrifice--are all potent encouragements to moral maturation and even ennoblement. [Bennett, 269]
Someone else who understood these things very well was Unitarian Ralph Waldo
Emerson. He defined "friend" as "a person with whom I may
be sincere. Before [whom], I may think aloud." That is how we are and what
we do with one another here at Lake Region. For that reason, Emerson's further
comment applies to us: "Happy is the house that shelters a friend."
This is a "happy house," indeed, with over 120 people all of whom
need and want friends, some of them much more than you may realize; and all
of whom can be good friends to others, some of them much more than they may
realize. But while "a friend may well be reckoned the masterpiece of nature,"
as Emerson phrased it, he also correctly pointed out that friendship requires
constant work and nurture if it is to grow and blossom. As he said, "The
only way to have a friend is to be one." [Emerson, 132, 131, 133, 139]
What that means for a congregation is that charity--love--really does begin
"at home." If we can't love our real neighbors--the Members and
Friends of Lake Region who live down the street or across town from us--then
we will be hardpressed to "love" our metaphorical "neighbors"
who live in foreign lands on the other side of the globe!
But if we love these people, and if they love us, then we will have satisfied
the most basic of our needs on Maslow's Pyramid, and we will, deservedly, feel
good. What's more, we will be motivated to reach out beyond ourselves to help
others--outside of this fellowship--feel good as well!
[2] Why are we here at Lake Region? The
first reason, then, is to feel good; but the second reason is: to be good.
Feeling good is not an end in itself. It is, instead, the means whereby we become
enabled to move on to the second phase of "goodness," which is "being
good."
Being good is a matter of intention and desire: no matter how
good we feel, no matter how much our actions may benefit others, if our intentions
are not good, then, we are morally and ethically bankrupt; and if our intentions
are bad, then we are evil. "Being good"--as every religion teaches--is
always a matter of having our hearts in the right places.
It's not always easy to want to be good. We get tired from trying, frustrated
from failing, and angry when people oppose us. Sometimes we just want to give
up and quit!
But that's why we come here for an hour on Sunday each week! As trite as it
sounds, this place really is our spiritual filling station where we get
gassed up again with high octane fuels like enthusiasm, courage, and love. This
is where we share our liberal "war stories" with other progressive
"combatants" in the spiritual battle for a better world. This is where
we rediscover that we are not alone in the struggle. This is where we sing songs
and hear messages of inspiration about the brave pioneers and exemplars who
went before us. Here, among others like ourselves, is where we reignite the
spark that kindles the fire that warms our hearts and lights our way so that
we can be good, as well as feel good.
[3]
Finally, why are we here at Lake Region? The third reason is: to do good.
As Henry David Thoreau put it: "Be not simply good, be good for
something!" [Seldes, 457]
There are opportunities aplenty to do good.
Some of them exist within this Fellowship itself. They consist of all
those things that need to be done in and around Lake Region as part of our caring
for one another. You know the list. You have seen it, for I have posted it on
the bulletin boards in our hallways. There are over 130 items on it, all of
which can and must be performed by the Members and Friends of this congregation
if it is function. Officers and trustees must do the administrative work of
our official Board. Committees need to be chaired and staffed with multiple
members, so as to lighten the work load of each individual. People need to be
cared for. That involves telephoning, sending cards and letters, providing rides,
cooking food, visiting in homes and hospitals, baby-sitting, attending memorials,
and running errands. (Others are willing to do these things for us. We ought
to be willing to do these things for them. We must "walk the walk"
of our U.U. Principles, and not just "talk the talk" or else
we are no better than the religious hypocrites we criticize so often.) Our buildings
and grounds also need constant attention. Broken things must be repaired. Dirty
things must be cleaned. Chairs and tables must be set up and taken down. Dishes
and silverware must be washed and put up. Grass must be cut, hedges trimmed,
litter picked up, and mulch spread. Our newsletter must be written, printed,
photocopied, collated, folded, addressed, and mailed. Our Religious Education
classrooms need teachers. Our Wednesday evening Forums must have persons to
find speakers, plan programs, open up and lock up the buildings, and publicize
the events. People are needed to secure speakers, plan programs, and make bulletins
for those Sundays when the minister is not in the pulpit. Moderators are needed
for every Sunday. Coffee and refreshments must be prepared for our before and
after services; and cleanup must be done afterward. The same needs must be met
for our Potluck Sunday lunches. Hosts are needed for our circle dinners. Greeters
and Chalice lighters, people to operate our public address system, choir members
and other musicians are all needed. A finance chair and pledge drive volunteers
are absolutely essential if we are to maintain our budget. A publicity committee
is required so that the public can know what this congregation is doing. Then
there are the many, many other items on the list!
None of these things gets done by itself, and none of these things is unimportant.
Doing any of them is doing something "good." Moreover, as the reading
in the backs of our hymnals reminds us, "Faith, by itself, if it has no
works, is dead." [Singing, 668 from James 2] Some of such works need to
be done here, within this Fellowship.
Farther afield there is also much good that we can and should do--in
Lakeland and Polk County. As an institution, it is not the business of this
Fellowship to feed and clothe or to shelter and protect the disadvantaged within
our society. There are professional agencies that do that work, and do it better
than this Fellowship ever could. As individuals, however, it is our responsibility
to assist those agencies when and where and however we can with our time and
talents and money. To help us do these acts of goodness, we have a very special
"Social Concerns Committee." It acts as a clearing house, bringing
us information about the needs these agencies have, and how we can help meet
them. Its members work with and sometimes work in these agencies, providing
secretarial staffing, nursing assistance, food preparation, clothes and toy
collection. In all these ways, the Members and Friends of Lake Region carry
this congregation's ministry beyond these walls.
The need for our doing good does not stop at the county line, of course. There
is much work to be done helping others throughout the state of Florida, throughout
the United States, and around the world. Again, there are agencies specifically
designed for these tasks, and it is our individual responsibility to contact
them and volunteer whatever assistance we can. Both our Florida District and
our national Unitarian Universalist Association headquarters provide us with
information about what we can do and who we might contact. Right here within
this congregation, we also have our own subcommittee of the "Unitarian
Universalist Service Committee" which conducts educational, medical, and
relief efforts overseas.
As the 2nd, 6th, and 7th of our "Principles" remind us, we--as Unitarian
Universalists--are committed: to "justice, equity and compassion in human
relations," to "the goal of world community with peace, liberty, and
justice for all," and to "respect for the interdependent web of all
existence."
It is because of such principles that our U.U. slogan has always been: "Deeds,
not creeds."
Why, then, are we here at Lake Region? We are here, first of all,
to feel good about ourselves and about other people as together
we strive to fulfill our human potential. Secondly, we are here to be
good by learning how to make love and goodness the real intentions of
our hearts. Finally, we are here to do good by acting out deeds
which will make this world a better place. Why are we here? In a phrase: We
are here, for goodness' sake!
Amen!
=====================================================
Sources
Bennett, William J. The Book of Virtues. New York: Simon & Schuster,
1993.
Emerson, Ralph Waldo. The Works of Ralph Waldo Emerson. New York:
Tudor Publishing Company, no date given.
Houston, John P., et al. Essentials of Psychology. New York: Academic
Press, 1981.
Joker@joker.org (Joke of the Day). "The
President." 5/13/00.
Seldes, George. The Great Thoughts. New York: Ballantine Books, 1996.
Singing the Living Tradition. Boston: Beacon Press, 1993.